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crystalxuk

Offline (the 07/31/2015 at 7:19am) | Search for a member

crystalxuk

4Fucked!

crystalxukcrystalxuk
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 528
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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crystalxuk's page activity

Visits<b>philsh94</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 7:54pm<b>bkc1980</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 12:53am<b>ricardof</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 3:03pm<b>SpartyOnWayne</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 1:31am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 9:05pm<b>sullysair123</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 10:45pm<b>imyy</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 9:37am<b>jtfrisch</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 9:11am<b>Poohbear12345</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 4:48pm<b>conman317</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 2:09pm<b>rockwrench</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 9:21am<b>milehigh52</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 1:07am<b>Kels789</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 12:25am<b>FatKitty</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 12:17am<b>alfonze07</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 11:31pm<b>wakemeupplease</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 6:34pm<b>Raki_92</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 5:04pm<b>CVTTRVN</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 2:15pm

Fucked!<b>philsh94</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 1:54am<b>jtfrisch</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 1:24am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 12:01am

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crystalxuk's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was working at a bakery, a woman stormed in, cut in front of the line, and began yelling at me. She claimed I didn't give her a sandwich earlier and demanded a refund. She got the refund out of my paycheck, and as she was leaving she muttered, "Ha, works every time." FML

#21446622
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27171) - you deserved it (1793)

On 07/24/2015 at 4:08pm - work - by jb100 - United States (Missouri)

Today, about 30 seconds into my first blowjob, my girlfriend threatened to cut my balls off if I didn't "just fucking cum already". FML

#21446517
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24594) - you deserved it (2210)

On 07/24/2015 at 12:44pm - intimacy - by fuck (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend's dad helped me put coolant in my car. When I said I wished I could do something in return, he told me to get an abortion so I wouldn't "ruin" his son's life. When I told my boyfriend, he didn't believe me. FML

#21444969
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26283) - you deserved it (2296)

On 07/21/2015 at 11:17am - misc - by father-in-nope (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on my first date in 6 months, to a Thai restaurant. We both got food poisoning and spent the entire evening alternately running to the bathroom while pretending that we were fine. FML

#21443781
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25639) - you deserved it (1824)

On 07/18/2015 at 11:29pm - intimacy - by padthaimeanoose - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, the guy I've been dating for 3 weeks showed up at my house at 7 AM. I was about to give him a kiss when he said, "Good morning, is Sarah here?" I was confused until I realized he didn't recognize me because I had no make up on. FML

Today, my wife was in seemingly never-ending labor. It got so bad, I overheard a nurse in the doorway mutter to a coworker that she hoped my baby would just die or something, so she could finally go take a smoke break. FML

#21439756
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35453) - you deserved it (1695)

On 07/10/2015 at 9:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after replacing several components on my new used car, I realized that the reason it wasn't getting the gas mileage it was supposed to because my coworkers take turns siphoning my gas while I work. FML

#21435168
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25756) - you deserved it (1457)

On 07/02/2015 at 12:16am - work - by thatshelpful - United States (Iowa)

Today, I decided to break up with my boyfriend. The main reason being that he doesn't value my time, and fails to see how canceling at the last minute is rude and a major inconvenience. I wanted to be respectful enough by breaking things off face to face. He cancelled, at the last minute. FML

#21433097
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25331) - you deserved it (2080)

On 06/28/2015 at 1:06am - love - by Waste Someone Else's Time - United States

Today, I overheard my soon to be step-daughter telling her friend on the phone that she hopes that me and her father's wedding is just a big joke and that he isn't really going to go through with it. I just dropped five grand on a dress and venue. She's in for a surprise. FML

#21430948
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23852) - you deserved it (2518)

On 06/24/2015 at 12:02am - love - by bummed out step monster - United States (California)

Today, my bike was stolen. These things happen so I went to work. On my walk to work a girl pulls up on my bike and says I need to fix the brakes, someone could kill themselves. Hands the bike to me and runs off. Not even 3 minutes pass as police surround me and accuse me of stealing my own bike. FML

#21429443
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25570) - you deserved it (1443)

On 06/21/2015 at 9:29am - misc - by cwell88 (man) -

Today, my girlfriend suggested we start using a safe word during sex - not because we're into BDSM or anything like that, it's just in case she gets bored and wants me to stop. FML

#21412386
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29384) - you deserved it (4508)

On 05/19/2015 at 2:45am - intimacy - by username - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I saw a real, erect penis for the first time. My brother's, while he was jerking off. He doesn't know I saw, because he was holding a pair of panties over his face with his other hand. I'm trying like hell to act like I'm not mentally scarred. FML

#21411971
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32405) - you deserved it (2982)

On 05/18/2015 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my drunk boyfriend decided to wake me up by fingering me. Let's just say going to the ER to get your tampon dug out isn't fun. FML

#21410572
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33353) - you deserved it (2595)

On 05/15/2015 at 3:54pm - intimacy - by nazirah4shizzle (woman) - United States

Today, I found out my wife confided in a coworker that she wants to sleep with him, because our marriage is loveless and sexless. News to me. FML

#21410043
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30452) - you deserved it (2717)

On 05/14/2015 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by semokco (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had to pick my brother up from work because he broke down crying. I arrived to find that apparently, you can get so stoned that serving a pregnant woman at a fast food joint moves you to tears over the miracle of life. FML

#21409953
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30188) - you deserved it (2213)

On 05/14/2015 at 10:23am - misc - by sistertaxi - Australia



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