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crushcrusher

Offline (the 06/11/2014 at 6:22am) | Search for a member

crushcrusher

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 April 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 181
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About crushcrusher : I dream of a better tomorrow where chickens can cross the streets without being questioned of their motives.

crushcrusher's page activity

Visits<b>miketopgunmike1</b> - yesterday at 3:35am<b>morondon000</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 3:31am<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 7:29pm<b>JJ_V3N0M</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 2:07am<b>ironfey</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 8:45pm<b>texashater75</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 11:54pm<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 10:11pm<b>Breizhlelo</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 6:09pm<b>lawmonkey</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 2:13am<b>MortenM</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 6:26pm<b>ex_omer</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 2:58pm<b>MRP360</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 11:22am<b>buster113</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 5:31am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 6:07pm<b>cohenb93</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 4:28pm<b>ioerror</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 3:06pm<b>nickjt30</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 12:30pm<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 11:54am

crushcrusher's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of crushcrusher's badges

crushcrusher's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on Facebook. The third post down was a selfie of my mom looking sad, with the caption, "God I need a good dicking." FML

#21218442
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43122) - you deserved it (11161)

On 07/23/2014 at 4:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was scrubbing the bloody aftermath of a successful mouse trap off of my stove with an old toothbrush. After a few good scrubs, out of habit I put the toothbrush in my mouth while I turned on the water. FML

Today, I found out that my son has been trying to save enough of his earwax to make a candle. FML

#21208907
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38904) - you deserved it (4967)

On 07/14/2014 at 1:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my boobs. I quickly found out that I'd accidentally sent it to my sister instead. She sent me one back. FML

#21196202
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41197) - you deserved it (23292)

On 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by boob sisters (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, at school, I got seated in front of the resident creepy kid that everyone stayed away from. I was pretty relieved to get through most of the class with no incidents, until the bell rang and he tore out a chunk of my hair, yelling "DNA! DNA!" FML

#21153319
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45149) - you deserved it (3744)

On 05/27/2014 at 11:58am - misc - by Laura (woman) - United States

Today, the creepy kid who sits behind me in English class decided that sniffing my hair wasn't disturbing enough for his liking, so he tried something new: popping one of the pimples on my neck. When I reacted in horror, all he could say was, "It looked pretty..." FML

#21134831
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45643) - you deserved it (4178)

On 05/09/2014 at 1:24pm - love - by WTTFFFF (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my dad and I got into an argument. When I was proven wrong, he said, "Good job, genius." I shot back the first thing that popped into my head, which was "I am not a genius!" He laughed and says that if I die before him, he's having that engraved on my tombstone. FML

#21122879
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32051) - you deserved it (12531)

On 04/25/2014 at 5:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my teenage daughter tried to convince me that the UK is a part of Canada. After I pulled out a map to prove her wrong, she got all angry and defensive, and said that nobody's perfect at "geometry". My daughter is an idiot. FML

#21122867
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49578) - you deserved it (9929)

On 04/25/2014 at 5:21pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I saw a cute guy and decided to say hi. As I started to think about things to talk about, one story in particular about a drummer who looked like Jesus stuck out in my mind. I was so nervous that instead of saying hi, I blurted out, "Some people look like Jesus!" and took off. FML

Today, after months of being on anti-depression medication and feeling very little emotionally, I finally felt some joy. Sadly it was from completely crushing my husband in an argument he started, where he claimed ketchup is a vegetable. FML

#21107568
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35706) - you deserved it (4299)

On 04/08/2014 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Veneto)

Today, while playing basketball, my friend thanked me for passing the ball to him. I was too embarrassed to tell him that that was me shooting. FML

#21106910
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33222) - you deserved it (4460)

On 04/07/2014 at 4:54pm - misc - by DetergentFrog6 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got billed for $80 of Justin Bieber music. It wouldn't have been so bad if it were my daughter who bought it all, instead of my husband. FML

#21096936
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40478) - you deserved it (3932)

On 03/26/2014 at 2:00pm - misc - by husbands addiction - United States (California)

Today, I was walking through the main lobby at school and I saw someone waving at me, so I waved back. Turns out she was just cleaning a glass door. I heard laughter behind me. FML

#21085559
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38266) - you deserved it (5792)

On 03/13/2014 at 7:59am - misc - by Crochocinco85 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML

#21081466
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47850) - you deserved it (9534)

On 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm - love - by cunning glassist (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



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  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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