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crondickinator

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crondickinator

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  • Number of visits : 229
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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crondickinator's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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crondickinator's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up with horrible pain in my gut. It got worse and worse, and I started vomiting from the pain. My mom said it was flu and that I needed to "man up." It turned out to be appendicitis, and I'm now typing this from my hospital bed. FML

#20777668
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51992) - you deserved it (2756)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:28pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was eating a corndog, when my boyfriend jokingly told me to "take it deeper". I did, and ended up choking and throwing up all over the table. FML

#20775966
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26006) - you deserved it (49144)

On 07/11/2013 at 1:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my therapist told me to write any negative thoughts that I had on a piece of paper and then set fire to it. When I lit it in the trash can, huge flames broke out and I had to throw the trash can out my window to keep from setting my house on fire. FML

#20775563
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28415) - you deserved it (36928)

On 07/11/2013 at 3:10am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I had the opportunity to taste a live spider by walking into its web in the dark. FML

#20770695
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43316) - you deserved it (4558)

On 07/08/2013 at 2:55pm - misc - by pinkXpress1023 - United Kingdom

Today, during my family's traditional 4th of July weekend celebration, my water broke. I kept trying to tell them and asked them to take me to the hospital, but they couldn't hear me over the fireworks. They all just kept smiling and nodding. FML

#20767424
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48973) - you deserved it (2965)

On 07/06/2013 at 5:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML

#20765643
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43148) - you deserved it (4693)

On 07/05/2013 at 5:59pm - misc - by -_- (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up from an extremely intense and pleasurable wet dream. This wouldn't have been bad, had it not been about Velveeta cheese. FML

#20762710
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45083) - you deserved it (8984)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by idk ask freud - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mother-in-lawyer threatened to sue me unless I took my professional wedding photographs off Facebook as she did not like that they made her look fat. She is over 300 pounds. FML

#20761484
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66676) - you deserved it (4235)

On 07/03/2013 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Nicks - United States (Nevada)

Today, I tried acid for the first time while camping with my best friend. A drunk driver smashed into my car, leaving it totaled. I had to explain the situation to a cop all while thinking my car was bleeding green ooze. FML

#20759193
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24194) - you deserved it (62698)

On 07/02/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw my former high school teacher at the mall. After a nice conversation, she mentioned that I "still dress like a slut." FML

#20757992
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40141) - you deserved it (19620)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I realized that getting wasted before finals is not a good idea. I sat down in the test hall, reached into my bag for a pencil, and found instead three baby carrots and a spoon. FML

#20757745
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18821) - you deserved it (58611)

On 07/01/2013 at 10:39am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to get new shoes. I'm a pretty tall girl and I have proportional feet. I asked the cute guy who worked there for a size 9.5. He burst into laughter before putting on a shocked face and saying, "Oh wait... You're serious." Goodbye, self esteem. FML

#20757181
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42249) - you deserved it (2738)

On 07/01/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by theyre not THAT big. (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, what started off as an amazing date with my girlfriend ended with me driving her drunk ass home while she sat in the backseat making out with her new boyfriend. FML

Today, my husband and I were at the mall, and decided to have a snack at the food court. As we ate, an obese woman squeezed past our table, butt facing us. Just when her ass-cheeks slid past our heads, she let out a horrific fart that my father would be proud of. FML

#20755283
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48822) - you deserved it (3131)

On 06/30/2013 at 12:21am - misc - by whipplewhip - United States

Today, a drunk driver drove his car through my mailbox. He got pissed, started yelling, and threatened to sue me for "putting the mailbox in the middle of the road". If my front lawn is a road, I'm going to have some serious issues. FML

#20754226
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40491) - you deserved it (2391)

On 06/29/2013 at 12:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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