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criss90

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criss90

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 27 December 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 975
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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criss90's page activity

Visits<b>Edogg215</b> - 24 hours ago<b>scottyboy417</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 2:15pm<b>Brandi_Faith</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 3:29pm<b>xnikkilynn</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 1:06pm<b>Mikeymikey</b> - the 12/11/2009 at 1:20am

Liked!<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 9:33pm

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criss90's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML

#21015691
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62648) - you deserved it (7363)

On 01/03/2014 at 5:08pm - intimacy - by notsohandy (man) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

#21008430
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40941) - you deserved it (9720)

On 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm - health - by beemove (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, it's been a little over a month since my dad started taking yoga lessons. We always joked around behind his back that he was just doing it so he could get flexible enough to suck himself off. Well, that joke was confirmed as reality when I walked in on him trying just that. FML

#21001267
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50152) - you deserved it (6940)

On 12/22/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by bleach bleach bleach (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML

#21001182
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48896) - you deserved it (4869)

On 12/22/2013 at 10:36am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, a man started a deep conversation with me at the bus stop about life, death, and the miracles of things we take for granted every day. I was really enjoying it until he looked at his watch and said, "Oh shit, mushrooms make me lose track of time!" and ran off into the night. FML

#20998821
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39519) - you deserved it (4434)

On 12/20/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by whatjusthappened (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boss found out that my girlfriend dumped me. He asked if that meant she would no longer bring her delicious homemade cookies to the office. When I said yes, he fired me on the spot. FML

#20990683
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47935) - you deserved it (3053)

On 12/12/2013 at 10:08pm - work - by justin (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims to be, she is not ready for you to speak Klingon during sex. FML

#20963971
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25799) - you deserved it (63773)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my debate partner repeatedly said "You mad, bro?" to the opposing team in our college debate class. That debate was worth a considerable portion of our grade. FML

#20959913
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40571) - you deserved it (2891)

On 11/16/2013 at 3:18pm - misc - by gonnafail (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend brought a 12-pack of beer to my mother's wake. FML

#20958939
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36915) - you deserved it (4418)

On 11/15/2013 at 5:51pm - misc - by haqL (man) - Mexico (Queretaro de Arteaga)

Today, I was at a party with a few of my friends. We saw a guy walking around with bright pink lipstick all over his mouth, so we made a bet to see who could match the lipstick to the girl first. I won. It was my girlfriend's. FML

#20953788
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55384) - you deserved it (4062)

On 11/11/2013 at 10:55am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out that when you flush an animal clear of blood for research, there is a nerve inside the heart, which when you strike it right, electrical signals cause the animal to writhe as if alive. Now, my boss knows about my fear of zombies, and I'm now terrified of half my job. FML

#20953149
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37270) - you deserved it (4868)

On 11/10/2013 at 8:52pm - work - by kittkatt1 - United States (Michigan)

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

#20950369
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44308) - you deserved it (3343)

On 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm - work - by thank god you'll only live once (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I were watching Jurassic Park. At the end of the movie, he commented on how amazed he was that they could "train those dinosaurs" to do exactly what they wanted them to do. FML

#20937890
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46737) - you deserved it (5060)

On 10/29/2013 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my wife ate nothing all day due to her morning sickness, but I tried to get her to eat something light, for our baby's sake. I brought her a banana. She yelled at me for being a "pervert" and accused me of just wanting to watch her stick a phallic object in her mouth. FML

#20935582
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44258) - you deserved it (4970)

On 10/27/2013 at 12:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)



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