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crisanba

Offline (the 12/09/2014 at 6:44am) | Search for a member

crisanba

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 February 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 647
  • Number of comments : 89
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About crisanba : I'm pretty easy going I don't do very much and I can take a joke but I prefer to read one than be part of one. In pretty inviting of messaging from new people so if you get the idea I don't mind reading it and responding

crisanba's page activity

Visits<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:39am<b>mk1hate1my1job1</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 10:51pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 5:21pm<b>kayden_14</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 10:07pm<b>rach0545</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 5:39pm<b>aha_awkward_</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 12:03pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 4:19am<b>Larry01</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 11:05pm<b>Erin2009</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 4:24pm<b>Vanshikap</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 11:55pm<b>starbarbazar</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 11:54pm<b>SLTgirl</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 12:42am<b>marinade18</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 1:14am<b>Ayezed</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 2:15pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 1:37pm<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 4:10am<b>CsHx</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 2:38am<b>TJ059</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 12:19pm

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crisanba's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in my room playing with my pet. I told my snake, "Who needs friends when I have you?" Through the wall I heard my neighbors say, "You do." I've never met my neighbors. FML

#20949324
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39429) - you deserved it (8007)

On 11/07/2013 at 6:08pm - misc - by Where is the faith in Humanity - United States (Washington)

Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding and everything was going perfectly as planned. That is, until a bird flew over us and left a present right between my boobs. I had to stand at the altar for 30 minutes as bird poop melted in my cleavage. FML

#20837089
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55254) - you deserved it (5032)

On 08/14/2013 at 1:39pm - misc - by NewBride (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

#20837021
190 comments

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

#20807393
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40875) - you deserved it (27552)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I attempted some bondage for the first time. Within seconds of the handcuffs being put on, I went into a serious panic attack. I was playing the dominant; my girlfriend was the one in cuffs. FML

#20806809
118 comments

Today, I realised that I can tell my 6 cats apart by the sound of their paws on the carpet. I think I need friends. FML

#20803453
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44527) - you deserved it (8826)

On 07/25/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, I helped my buddy write a sweet love letter to his girlfriend. After reading it, she dumped him for being an "Edward Cullen wannabe", and when my girlfriend found out, she dumped me for "cheating" on her by writing the letter in the first place. FML

#20802821
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47326) - you deserved it (5517)

On 07/25/2013 at 12:17pm - love - by ........................... (man) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my family. Over the next hour, a huge religious debate erupted, and my grandfather drunkenly told us all how he almost killed himself once while experimenting with auto-erotic asphyxiation. My boyfriend called us all crazy and seems to have dumped me. FML

#20788678
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46198) - you deserved it (5024)

On 07/17/2013 at 4:13pm - love - by fuck family (woman) - Poland (Dolnoslaskie)

Today, I was teaching my daughter how to drive. We were passing by a merge lane; I told her to slow down and let a green car merge in front of us. She said, "Fuck the green car" and sped up, colliding with it. Apparently she didn't know that would happen. FML

#20783255
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50917) - you deserved it (6475)

On 07/14/2013 at 11:40pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I held a house party. For fun, I made sure all the beer was alcohol-free, so I could see which of my friends would be weak-minded enough to end up acting drunk. Three did. I was one of them. FML

#20782525
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24437) - you deserved it (62408)

On 07/14/2013 at 5:25pm - misc - by scheisse (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML

#20782097
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48071) - you deserved it (16547)

On 07/14/2013 at 1:03pm - intimacy - by peniswoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, while having a serious talk with my father, he said, "Son, you're only alive because of a faulty, off-brand condom." FML

#20774202
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46897) - you deserved it (3309)

On 07/10/2013 at 12:33pm - misc - by my honest father - United States (Kansas)

Today, I held a party for my family so I could announce my pregnancy. In the middle of my speech, my mother stopped me, saying, "Nobody gives a rat's ass, where's the booze?" FML

#20745652
83 comments

Today, my girlfriend announced to everyone at dinner that she was no longer a virgin. This was news to everyone: her parents, siblings, best friend, and me. FML

#20742151
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66713) - you deserved it (4417)

On 06/23/2013 at 2:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my wife made me moist cat food burgers as a prank. I didnt have the heart to tell her that they tasted better than the ones she usually makes. FML

#20742017
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48622) - you deserved it (4019)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:05am - misc - by kittybad - United States



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