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crimsonlover4

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crimsonlover4

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crimsonlover4
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 26 May 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2435
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 27 posted

About crimsonlover4 : Hello loves,
I love reading these fmls mainly because they distract me from my own fucked up life and I have hope to have one of my own published some day :}

Godspeed!

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crimsonlover4's favorite FMLs

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

#16449288
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65319) - you deserved it (3608)

On 06/01/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by aarone23 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my husband and I had the grand opening to our new winery. We had a big sign out front saying "FREE GRAPES", to try and get more people interested. People kept giving us dirty looks when passing. We later realized there was something covering the "G". FML

#15903380
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33174) - you deserved it (9555)

On 04/24/2011 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I made plans with an old friend that I haven't seen in years. We agreed to meet at a diner and I told him I'd be standing outside. I watched him pull up, look right at me, then do something with his phone. Seconds later, I got a text saying "Sorry, but I'm busy today and can't make it." FML

#15130627
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32912) - you deserved it (3129)

On 02/26/2011 at 8:56pm - misc - by Angela (woman) - United States

Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML

#14838014
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68165) - you deserved it (6266)

On 02/04/2011 at 9:08am - intimacy - by theish -

Today, I found out that the woman I'm currently dating used to be a man. FML

#14105227
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55338) - you deserved it (9365)

On 12/06/2010 at 7:24am - intimacy - by swindstorm -

Today, while having sex on the couch with my single neighbour, a beam in the couch broke. Not even slightly fazed, she said, "It's okay, my husband can fix it." Husband? FML

#14059458
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32630) - you deserved it (7875)

On 12/02/2010 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by nickyboy (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I got hit in the mouth with a hockey stick and lost four teeth. Yesterday I got my braces of six years removed. FML

#14036176
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70863) - you deserved it (4962)

On 11/30/2010 at 2:10pm - health - by Anonymous - Ireland (Monaghan)

Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML

#13773002
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49861) - you deserved it (9444)

On 11/09/2010 at 12:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML

#13418490
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45273) - you deserved it (8160)

On 10/12/2010 at 8:57am - intimacy - by fungettingdressed - United States

Today, I went to the beach with this boy I like. Not thinking it'd be anything more than a simple date, I didn't shave my downstairs. We were sitting on a towel and I laid down. Then he said, "Is there a squirrel in your pants?" FML

#13245157
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16825) - you deserved it (38727)

On 09/29/2010 at 1:59am - intimacy - by Claire (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I put an anonymous note under my neighbour's door asking them to not have sex so loudly during the day. Since then, I haven't heard any sex. Unfortunately, I have heard a woman crying loudly because she just found out about her husband's affair. FML

#13157318
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44369) - you deserved it (9764)

On 09/22/2010 at 3:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, whilst at my awards night, I got a boner, right as it was my turn to accept my award. To avoid a awkward situation, I flipped it up and under my belt. This failed to make the situation any less awkward, because the head of my penis poked out through my shirt, in plain view of the audience. FML

Today, after going on a blind date with a man I had met on facebook, we decided to go back to his apartment. All was going good until he took off his pants, only to reveal that he was wearing a diaper. FML

#12929120
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38279) - you deserved it (18437)

On 09/06/2010 at 3:37am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had a volleyball game against our rivals. I hit myself in the face with the ball 3 times, fell flat on my face against the court, and later had an asthma attack with no inhaler in sight. We lost the game. FML

#12879741
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23527) - you deserved it (5990)

On 09/03/2010 at 1:05am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML

#12816242
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34108) - you deserved it (6289)

On 08/30/2010 at 2:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



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