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crimsonlover4

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crimsonlover4

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crimsonlover4
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 26 May 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2477
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 27 posted

About crimsonlover4 : Hello loves,
I love reading these fmls mainly because they distract me from my own fucked up life and I have hope to have one of my own published some day :}

Godspeed!

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crimsonlover4's favorite FMLs

Today, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center. At one point I decided to play "got your nose" with one of the kids. It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face. I got his nose... his prosthetic nose. FML

#17629318
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41352) - you deserved it (11601)

On 08/31/2011 at 12:04pm - kids - by MJjunior (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31434) - you deserved it (2999)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, I got my first hand job. I started bleeding. FML

#17619671
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39342) - you deserved it (5292)

On 08/30/2011 at 7:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went over to my friend's house. After knocking on the door, I was greeted by her hairy, 300+ pounds father in his underwear. He then hugged me. FML

#17602503
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28234) - you deserved it (2812)

On 08/28/2011 at 4:27am - misc - by CooBerry3851 - United States (Washington)

Today, while paying for groceries, I opened my wallet to find that all my cash had been exchanged for Monopoly money. FML

#17598415
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32710) - you deserved it (2739)

On 08/27/2011 at 8:38pm - money - by KayDayParade - United States

Today, a hooker refused my custom. According to her, "Even whores have standards." FML

#17548776
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19986) - you deserved it (41680)

On 08/22/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my grandmother sat me down and gave me a talk about the importance of personal hygiene. According to her, it's important that I shower twice a day, because "Fat people tend to have a most curious smell about them." FML

#17522929
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26461) - you deserved it (10751)

On 08/19/2011 at 8:22pm - health - by Username - United States

Today, I had a cop pull me over because he claimed that he saw me taking a bunch of colorful pills at the previous stop sign. I was eating skittles. FML

#17502057
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38353) - you deserved it (2802)

On 08/17/2011 at 5:50pm - misc - by candymansvan17 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, even though I made the point of tanning naked, I still got tan lines thanks to my fat rolls. FML

#17378554
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14238) - you deserved it (40635)

On 08/05/2011 at 3:06pm - health - by Username - United States

Today, my boyfriend fingered me. He never cuts his nails. It felt like I was getting intimate with Wolverine. FML

#17107547
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49180) - you deserved it (14547)

On 07/14/2011 at 12:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I decided to sing a sweet lullaby to my two year old son. In the process, he smacked me in the face and told me to please stop. My sister sings to him all the time and he loves it. FML

#16956898
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28941) - you deserved it (5791)

On 07/03/2011 at 1:36am - kids - by dee - United States

Today, I was baby sitting ten year old twins. When they first saw me, they ran away screaming and hid in the closet. This isn't the first house where this has happened. FML

#16944330
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28396) - you deserved it (4833)

On 07/02/2011 at 1:48am - kids - by annoyedwithkids - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was so broke that I paid for a $0.28 candy bar with my credit card. FML

#16938704
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24517) - you deserved it (11367)

On 07/01/2011 at 5:47pm - money - by Username - United States (Illinois)

Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML

#16892674
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41712) - you deserved it (3751)

On 06/28/2011 at 2:39am - intimacy - by girlshavepenises (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

#16879378
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60631) - you deserved it (7459)

On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



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