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crimsonlover4

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crimsonlover4
  • Town/Country : New York, NY
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 26 May 1988 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 1315
  • Number of comments : 92
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 22 posted

About crimsonlover4 : Hello lovelies,
I basically love reading these fmls mainly because they distract me from my own fucked up life. :}

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crimsonlover4's favorite FMLs

Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML

#13773002
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45168) - you deserved it (8493)

On 11/09/2010 at 12:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML

#13418490
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43579) - you deserved it (7927)

On 10/12/2010 at 8:57am - intimacy - by fungettingdressed - United States

Today, I went to the beach with this boy I like. Not thinking it'd be anything more than a simple date, I didn't shave my downstairs. We were sitting on a towel and I laid down. Then he said, "Is there a squirrel in your pants?" FML

#13245157
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15717) - you deserved it (36856)

On 09/29/2010 at 1:59am - intimacy - by Claire (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I put an anonymous note under my neighbour's door asking them to not have sex so loudly during the day. Since then, I haven't heard any sex. Unfortunately, I have heard a woman crying loudly because she just found out about her husband's affair. FML

#13157318
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42398) - you deserved it (9534)

On 09/22/2010 at 3:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, whilst at my awards night, I got a boner, right as it was my turn to accept my award. To avoid a awkward situation, I flipped it up and under my belt. This failed to make the situation any less awkward, because the head of my penis poked out through my shirt, in plain view of the audience. FML

Today, after going on a blind date with a man I had met on facebook, we decided to go back to his apartment. All was going good until he took off his pants, only to reveal that he was wearing a diaper. FML

#12929120
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33702) - you deserved it (16948)

On 09/06/2010 at 3:37am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had a volleyball game against our rivals. I hit myself in the face with the ball 3 times, fell flat on my face against the court, and later had an asthma attack with no inhaler in sight. We lost the game. FML

#12879741
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21774) - you deserved it (5758)

On 09/03/2010 at 1:05am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML

#12816242
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32480) - you deserved it (6108)

On 08/30/2010 at 2:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44035) - you deserved it (14244)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, at a family dinner, my new husband compared deciding to marry me to buying a used car. Some of the similarites included looking under the hood and finding out how many previous owners there were. FML

#12655569
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25364) - you deserved it (6602)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:13am - intimacy - by carwife - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was riding the subway when a beautiful topless girl walked into my car and sat directly in front of me. Then, the train stopped abruptly and I banged my head. The girl was gone and I realized it had all been a dream. Then I realized I was supposed to get off 17 stops ago. FML

#12544003
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16216) - you deserved it (34444)

On 08/15/2010 at 6:31pm - intimacy - by Peekaman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I pretended to go for a run to impress someone on AIM. FML

#12252976
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7482) - you deserved it (31915)

On 08/01/2010 at 9:59pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I went camping with my husband. We drove 11 hours to his favourite site before he remembered he didn't put the tent in the car. FML

#11374719
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28841) - you deserved it (5144)

On 06/22/2010 at 3:47am - misc - by angry - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out there is such a thing as eyebrow dandruff, and that I have it. FML

#10775711
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25698) - you deserved it (4979)

On 05/26/2010 at 11:54am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was hooking up with a guy I just met. Things were getting hot and heavy and he asked me if I had a condom. I said no, and to which he replied "that's okay, we can just use a sock" and pulled his sock off of his left foot. FML

#7450891
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23471) - you deserved it (5118)

On 01/20/2010 at 1:17am - intimacy - by ilovesocks (woman) - United States (New York)



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