crazycookiecr

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crazycookiecr

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 August 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1135
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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crazycookiecr's page activity

Visits<b>graceh58</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 7:25am<b>TallyFtw69</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 7:49am<b>jaakeeyy1</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 11:57pm<b>the_untouchables</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 8:45pm<b>sibeso</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 6:00pm<b>baconator666</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 12:02pm<b>ayazdgrade</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 4:27am<b>Crash7777</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 2:14am<b>brians2617m</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 8:08pm<b>crackmore278</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 7:13pm<b>jessicaf10</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 3:31pm<b>olpally</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 12:41am<b>LiGhTMaGiCk</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 7:43am<b>FoxxSkies</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 11:48am<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 3:13am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 1:23pm<b>tomc6748</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 5:10pm<b>dinosxxrawr</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 3:45am

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crazycookiecr's favorite FMLs

Today, I was invited to a party. Since I rarely get invited to any, I was super pumped. Both my parents work late, so I texted a couple of people to see if I could catch a ride. It turned out everyone's cars were full. I ended up missing one of the only parties I've ever been invited to. FML

by my_only_friend / 06/03/2013 at 12:45am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, feeling the need to spice things up in our sex life, I dressed up in my husband's navy uniform jacket, hat, and a pair of heels. When he came into the room, he took one look at me and started laughing uncontrollably. FML

by anonymous / 06/03/2013 at 12:41am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I got a text message while driving home. I checked after arriving, and found it was a kinky text from my boyfriend, so I sent him an even kinkier reply. He later raged at me, because I somehow should have known he was showing off his phone to his mom when I sent my reply. FML

by i'm not psychic, mother fucker / 06/02/2013 at 4:48pm / Sweden (Uppsala Lan) / Intimacy

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, the doorbell rang. I saw my incredibly overbearing mum's car outside, so I stayed quiet and tried to sneak upstairs. As I crawled through the hallway, commando style, I realised the door blinds were still out for cleaning. If scowls could kill, I'd be roasting in Hell right now. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2013 at 8:40am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, a man asked about fishing in the river which flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:40pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Work

Today, one of my boyfriend's friends commented on how small my boobs are. My boyfriend defended me, saying it was only because I was wearing a sports bra. I wasn't. It was the push-up bra he bought me. FML

by Anonymous / 05/25/2013 at 7:12pm / United States / Love

Today, it was my wedding. Every good wedding has slutty wedding sex, and I thought it would be over after my cousin and his girlfriend were caught in the parking lot. I was wrong, the sluttiest wedding sex goes to my drunk husband and sister in the coat room. FML

by lizzie / 05/25/2013 at 2:55am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

by yesguysgetabusedtoo / 05/24/2013 at 7:42pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love

Today, a package was delivered to my house, addressed to me, clearly marked "sexual health products". Inside were condoms, birth control pills, and an invoice made out to me. My parents went ballistic and grounded me. Whoever staged this "hilarious" prank: well played, asshole. FML

by Anonymous / 05/24/2013 at 5:43pm / Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla) / Intimacy

Today, my cockgoblin of an ex showed up at my house, begging me to take him back. This guy, with his friends' help, faked being kidnapped just so he could use the "trauma" to guilt me into sleeping with him after he "escaped". When he finally left, he yelled that I'm a selfish bitch. FML

by SariLone / 05/19/2013 at 2:02pm / India (Maharashtra) / Love

Today, I saw my ex husband walking with his very beautiful, very pregnant wife. We divorced 7 months ago because he told me he was gay. FML

by stephscort / 05/11/2013 at 9:32am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2013 at 2:59am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while driving my grandma home from a family dinner, I had to pull into a gas station, because my tank was almost empty. She became convinced that someone would kidnap her while I went to pay, and eventually threatened to blow us up by tossing her lighter at the gas pumps. FML

by fuckingjesusgran / 05/07/2013 at 6:13pm / Bosnia and Herzegovina (Federation of Bosnia and Herzego) / Transportation

Today, I was hitting on a cute girl on the bus. It was going well, and she gave me her name to add on Facebook. Since I didn't have the app, I opened Safari on my phone. It opened to my video from Pornhub I watched yesterday and started playing, on full volume, through the entire bus. FML

by acnecream / 05/03/2013 at 9:23am / Finland (Eastern Finland) / Transportation