crazycookiecr

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crazycookiecr

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 August 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1001
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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crazycookiecr's page activity

Visits<b>graceh58</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 7:25am<b>TallyFtw69</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 7:49am<b>jaakeeyy1</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 11:57pm<b>the_untouchables</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 8:45pm<b>sibeso</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 6:00pm<b>baconator666</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 12:02pm<b>ayazdgrade</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 4:27am<b>Crash7777</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 2:14am<b>brians2617m</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 8:08pm<b>crackmore278</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 7:13pm<b>jessicaf10</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 3:31pm<b>olpally</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 12:41am<b>LiGhTMaGiCk</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 7:43am<b>FoxxSkies</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 11:48am<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 3:13am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 1:23pm<b>tomc6748</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 5:10pm<b>dinosxxrawr</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 3:45am

crazycookiecr's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of crazycookiecr's badges

crazycookiecr's favorite FMLs

Today, my spouse asked me if I could transfer some of the passion I have for buffalo wings into our relationship. FML

Today, I went on a date with a guy I really liked. The date was going great until he decided to try flossing his teeth with my hair. FML

by hairless by death / 08/13/2013 at 12:07pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was watching a movie with my family in which a character said "Fuck you, dad." My dad then slapped me over the head to get my attention and said, "Never talk to your father like that." Okay, dad. FML

by idonteven / 08/12/2013 at 4:04pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, in the middle of examining me, my gynecologist suddenly took a sharp intake of breath and vomited on the floor. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2013 at 7:10am / Latvia (Jelgavas) / Health

Today, I was buying ingredients for a salad. I had only picked up a few cucumbers, when an elderly lady came up to me and murmured, "Make sure you use lots of lube, or that'll hurt. Been there, sweetheart." What the HELL? FML

by um... what the fuck, miss? / 08/02/2013 at 4:23pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, after learning that my wife has been cheating on me, I decided to distract myself by playing The Sims. Not long after I began, my Sim's wife basically started cheating on him. FML

by Anonymous / 08/02/2013 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

by turning red / 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of over a year has been cheating on me the whole time, but that "it's just physical". However, he doesn't want to do anything "physical" with me, except cuddle when we're together. FML

by heartbroken / 07/10/2013 at 3:08pm / Australia / Love

Today, while at the doctor's, a week overdue with my first child, I was told that sex and orgasms can sometimes help to induce labor. On the way home, my boyfriend asked for road head, arguing that "She said that stuff about orgasms." Not you, honey. FML

by realitybites / 07/08/2013 at 1:03pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I returned home from an extended vacation only to find out my cousin wasn't kidding when he said he was going to steal my boyfriend. I thought I was dating a straight guy. FML

by Anonymous / 07/03/2013 at 4:56pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I tried acid for the first time while camping with my best friend. A drunk driver smashed into my car, leaving it totaled. I had to explain the situation to a cop all while thinking my car was bleeding green ooze. FML

by Anonymous / 07/02/2013 at 1:24am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my crush kissed me for the first time. However, my hair was falling into my face and getting in the way. No problem, I wear a wig so without thinking, I simply removed it. I don't think he'll kiss me again anytime soon. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2013 at 6:58am / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I was teasing my 6-year-old sister about having a boyfriend. I asked her, "Did he take his shirt off?" She promptly said no. A few minutes later, she said, "But he did take his pants off." I then asked why. She said, "To show me his penis." FML

by joe / 06/23/2013 at 7:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, whilst trying on wedding dresses with my mom, she told me that I looked fat and awful in the dress I liked. When I told her how hurtful she was being, she told me that I should be grateful that she told me what she thought instead of laughing at me behind my back. FML

by mysea8679 / 06/12/2013 at 6:09pm / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ran the mile in gym class. I was the second to last person to finish, and I was left panting and feeling faint. When the teacher found out I hadn't come in dead last, he accused me of skipping a lap and is now making me rerun the entire thing. FML

by Anonymous / 06/12/2013 at 10:56am / United States / Miscellaneous