About crazoy : a man
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crazoy's favorite FMLs
Today, I stepped outside my office building for a smoke break and I witnessed a mugging so I ran over to stop it. I succeeded in getting mugged instead of the original target. I then couldn't get into my building until a coworker left an hour later. My boss was mad and still doesn't believe me. FML
by Fired / 04/08/2011 at 7:58am / Work
Today, my boyfriend and I flew to another country to see a concert. He said he'd carry all the cash and tickets in his wallet, so I left my bag at the hotel. He got so drunk, five minutes into the show he took off leaving me stranded in a strange city with no means of getting back to the hotel. FML
by givemechange / 04/06/2011 at 5:27am / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Holidays
Today, I accidentally forgot my glasses in a store bathroom. When I finally noticed, I went back to find that someone was wearing them as he was walking out of the store. I didn't have the balls to call him out on it. FML
by Trippy Penguin / 03/08/2011 at 9:23pm / Miscellaneous
Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML
by no name / 02/22/2011 at 7:25am / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/04/2011 at 10:27pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me and left me crying in the street. I then got a text from my mom saying how pathetic my love life was. Apparently, it was a mass text message and she accidentally added me to the list. FML
by isystuff / 02/01/2011 at 12:24am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, as I went into my calculus class, the teacher announced that someone had received a negative grade on the test we were getting back. I laughed and said, "Which f*cker managed to get a negative?" Turns out I'm the dumbass. FML
by terrible kenny / 01/30/2011 at 4:24am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I drove to buy new sneakers to work out and lose weight. Coming out of the store, I saw someone had parked too close to me. I had to beg a stranger to back my car out for me, because no matter how I tried, I couldn't get into the driver's seat. FML
by Anonymous / 01/19/2011 at 1:27am / United States (Texas) / Transportation
by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 5:50pm / France / Health
by Anonymous / 12/27/2010 at 12:11pm / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/26/2010 at 9:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/01/2010 at 10:58pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by Florida / 10/27/2010 at 2:46pm / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I felt really depressed so I decided to go to McDonald's, get a sundae and cheer myself up. I got pulled over by the cops on the way, and was given a ticket for an expired registration. McDonald's was closed. FML
by Anonymous / 10/25/2010 at 10:43pm / United States / Transportation
Today, I temporarily got off the bus for the other students to get off, because they push and shove along their way. Then the bus driver closed the door on me and drove off. My laptop was on that bus. FML
by Anonymous / 10/19/2010 at 6:33am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation