About cranker08 : Hello FML :D
I love meatloaf!
How old? Old enough to kick your ass.
Just kidding, very friendly chick!
About cranker08 : Hello FML :D
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An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
cranker08's favorite FMLs
Today, my parents met my girlfriend for the first time and cooked us dinner. After, I was helping clean up in the kitchen and my dad says to me, "Don't worry, you have to slay a couple of dragons before you get to the princess." and winks at me. She heard. I was going to propose to her tonight. FML
by Anonymous / 05/03/2009 at 12:12am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Em / 04/30/2009 at 12:45pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/10/2009 at 5:40pm / United States (Virginia) / Health
by rebekah / 04/03/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML
by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 4:18pm / United States (New York) / Love
by happybirthday / 03/24/2009 at 5:15pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
Today, I heard my boyfriend of 3 months talking with his friend, not knowing I could hear them. "Tonight's the night," my boyfriend says. "I'm finally going to tell her I love her!" I got really excited, deciding i loved him too. Then his friend says, "Awesome! But what about Kayla?" I'm Kayla. FML
by Anonymous / 03/22/2009 at 1:14pm / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML
by ScoobieDoo / 03/20/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Washington) / Kids
by Noname / 03/16/2009 at 12:05am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by KAAALIS / 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML
by twit / 03/15/2009 at 9:14pm / United States (Maryland) / Money
Today, my first girlfriend of over 3 years left me for another guy. She said she's looking for someone who can financially provide for her in the future. The dude owns a T-Mobile kiosk. I'm going to medical school. FML
by thankskimi / 03/15/2009 at 2:29pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, I learned that the surprise party thrown for my girlfriend's 19th birthday was wonderful and she couldn't be happier. Except that I didn't show up. Apparently 40 people were invited but I wasn't one of them. We've been going out for three years. FML
by chessgeeksam / 03/14/2009 at 3:28pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, I was the only one in an elevator when an attractive girl came in, talking on her phone. She told her friend, "I have to go, there's a cute guy on this elevator." Before I could even react, she turned to me and said, "Sorry for lying, I really wanted to get off the phone with her." FML
by TuralSucks / 03/10/2009 at 9:10pm / United States (Nebraska) / Love
Today, my best friend resolved things with her boyfriend after he had admitted to cheating on her. I felt really guilty because I drunkenly hooked up with her boyfriend last month. She said, "I felt better when he told me that the girl was extremely ugly and bad in bed." FML
by collegegirl90 / 03/09/2009 at 4:52pm / United States (Texas) / Love
- Today, I had to result to ordering headache meds on Amazon. Because my parents don't believe that… Today, I went to smash a spider in the junction between the wall and ceiling..... It fell a inch in… Today, I discovered that my friends have an ongoing bet on whether or not I will be as flat-chested…