About cranker08 : Hello FML :D
I love meatloaf!
How old? Old enough to kick your ass.
Just kidding, very friendly chick!
About cranker08 : Hello FML :D
cranker08's FML badges
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
cranker08's favorite FMLs
Today, my parents met my girlfriend for the first time and cooked us dinner. After, I was helping clean up in the kitchen and my dad says to me, "Don't worry, you have to slay a couple of dragons before you get to the princess." and winks at me. She heard. I was going to propose to her tonight. FML
by Anonymous / 05/03/2009 at 12:12am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Em / 04/30/2009 at 12:45pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/10/2009 at 5:40pm / United States (Virginia) / Health
by rebekah / 04/03/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML
by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 4:18pm / United States (New York) / Love
by happybirthday / 03/24/2009 at 5:15pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
Today, I heard my boyfriend of 3 months talking with his friend, not knowing I could hear them. "Tonight's the night," my boyfriend says. "I'm finally going to tell her I love her!" I got really excited, deciding i loved him too. Then his friend says, "Awesome! But what about Kayla?" I'm Kayla. FML
by Anonymous / 03/22/2009 at 1:14pm / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML
by ScoobieDoo / 03/20/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Washington) / Kids
by Noname / 03/16/2009 at 12:05am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by KAAALIS / 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML
by twit / 03/15/2009 at 9:14pm / United States (Maryland) / Money
Today, my first girlfriend of over 3 years left me for another guy. She said she's looking for someone who can financially provide for her in the future. The dude owns a T-Mobile kiosk. I'm going to medical school. FML
by thankskimi / 03/15/2009 at 2:29pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, I learned that the surprise party thrown for my girlfriend's 19th birthday was wonderful and she couldn't be happier. Except that I didn't show up. Apparently 40 people were invited but I wasn't one of them. We've been going out for three years. FML
by chessgeeksam / 03/14/2009 at 3:28pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, I was the only one in an elevator when an attractive girl came in, talking on her phone. She told her friend, "I have to go, there's a cute guy on this elevator." Before I could even react, she turned to me and said, "Sorry for lying, I really wanted to get off the phone with her." FML
by TuralSucks / 03/10/2009 at 9:10pm / United States (Nebraska) / Love
Today, my best friend resolved things with her boyfriend after he had admitted to cheating on her. I felt really guilty because I drunkenly hooked up with her boyfriend last month. She said, "I felt better when he told me that the girl was extremely ugly and bad in bed." FML
by collegegirl90 / 03/09/2009 at 4:52pm / United States (Texas) / Love
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…