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cranker08

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cranker08

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 406
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About cranker08 : Hello FML :D
I love meatloaf!
How old? Old enough to kick your ass.
Just kidding, very friendly chick!

Go Dodgers!

cranker08's page activity

Visits<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 11:48pm<b>Miss_Red</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 2:01am<b>msmama1985</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 11:44pm<b>TheNotoriousHGC</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 9:56am<b>o_oBriBrio_o</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 11:32pm<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 8:51pm<b>MaFioso13</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 6:07pm<b>fairy1775</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 6:04pm<b>littleric92</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 10:19am<b>rob02</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 11:52am<b>FlowerMama</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 2:34am<b>kingakbari</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 8:47am<b>Ceejay1</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 2:14am<b>boudin227</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 6:42pm<b>newzealand</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 5:15pm<b>ptuts</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 5:04pm<b>larson15</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 9:20pm<b>garrow5</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 5:30pm

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Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

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cranker08's favorite FMLs

Today, I was lost in a foreign city so I asked a girl for directions. She replied, "Directions? ONE DIRECTION!" and started screaming in my face and jumping around. FML

#20572868
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43000) - you deserved it (5200)

On 04/03/2013 at 5:17am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake, The Notebook playing on the TV, and a shoe thrown at my head. It's safe to say my girlfriend is just about on her period. FML

#20128340
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26220) - you deserved it (4788)

On 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by jesushelpme (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML

#20119371
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30804) - you deserved it (18095)

On 10/16/2012 at 8:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He decided that the best time would be while I was giving him a blowjob. He then seemed confused as to why I didn't finish. FML

#20114701
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33358) - you deserved it (3170)

On 10/13/2012 at 8:04am - intimacy - by notthebesttime -

Today, after a visit with my mom, I started feeling sick. I meant to send her a text asking if she had gotten sick lately, but I accidentally sent a text asking if she had gotten dick lately. FML

#20054615
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27567) - you deserved it (4610)

On 09/02/2012 at 7:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was walking home from work, when a clearly homeless guy who smelled like Jimmy Hoffa's colon grabbed me, pinned me to a wall, and demanded that I hand over my "booty". I don't know whether or not I was mugged by Jack Sparrow, but either way, he's now over £100 richer. FML

#19987585
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18311) - you deserved it (1956)

On 07/27/2012 at 3:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Midlothian)

Today, while at the store, I realized how socially inept I am when I said "excuse me" to a shopping cart because it was in my way. FML

Today, I accidentally moaned my own name during sex. FML

#18703291
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31608) - you deserved it (27357)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I spent $500 buying my lost cat back from a jerk who thought it was his. I get home and my mom tells me that she'd sold it to the same guy for $10 because she thought the cat was ruining my love life. FML

#17467108
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34482) - you deserved it (5755)

On 08/14/2011 at 3:16am - money - by Username - United States

Today, my boyfriend's mother walked in on us having sex. He started crying and ran into the bathroom where my clothes were located, leaving me to deal with his mother. Naked. FML

#17313020
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39569) - you deserved it (7510)

On 07/30/2011 at 8:45pm - intimacy - by cutiekenz21 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML

#17281952
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36848) - you deserved it (5547)

On 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by Nickname (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I got a completely random boner at a coffee shop, five seconds before two attractive women asked me to stand up and take their picture. FML

#17253981
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36648) - you deserved it (5202)

On 07/25/2011 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, the police were canvassing my neighbourhood about a recent robbery. When I answered the door, my brother saw badges, panicked, and jumped out our apartment's third-storey window in an attempt to escape. He thought they were after him for using a bong two weeks ago. I'm related to this twit. FML

#17252613
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31396) - you deserved it (3094)

On 07/25/2011 at 10:10am - misc - by Bec (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had a completely normal work day. Other than the fact that my boss dressed up like the lead singer from KISS and hit us with a foam sword at random. My boss is 49. FML

#17176050
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27112) - you deserved it (6039)

On 07/19/2011 at 11:19am - work - by Bill Harrison - United States

Today, at work, a regular started talking to me. Subject of choice? His overwhelming amount of earwax. Apparently he'd like to make a candle out of it once he goes to the doctor to get it removed. FML

#17106852
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21272) - you deserved it (1922)

On 07/14/2011 at 11:25am - work - by Breanne - Canada (Manitoba)



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