cowtippinpeehand

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cowtippinpeehand

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 13 January 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 817
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About cowtippinpeehand : Blahh.

cowtippinpeehand's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:41pm

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50 favourites

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cowtippinpeehand's favorite FMLs

Today, my entire family, myself included, has been turned into a collective diarrhea fountain after going out to eat. We only have one bathroom. FML

by shroooms / 07/28/2011 at 4:37pm / Slovenia (Bohinj) / Health

Today, I got into an argument with a militantly feminist co-worker of mine. She threw several vulgar insults at me and debased the entire male gender before storming off. I'd only asked if she needed help while she was doing a crossword. FML

by Rick / 07/28/2011 at 6:51am / United States (Indiana) / Work

Today, my husband threw out all of the spices in the cupboard. When I asked him why he said, "Our cat was named Spicy and I can't stand to look at them." Our recently deceased cat's name was Dicey. FML

by Tali / 07/28/2011 at 2:18am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, I was helping clean my grandpa's garage when I found some of his old election posters from the '50s. They included slogans such as, "Dick: you know it feels right" and "Want growth? Choose Dick." I'm not sure whether to be disgusted or impressed. FML

by Nick / 07/27/2011 at 1:32pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my birthday. Out of loneliness, I went to order some flowers and a cake "for a friend". The guy who delivered it to my house was the same guy from the counter. FML

by anon / 07/26/2011 at 8:01pm / Israel / Miscellaneous

Today, I went with my boyfriend to the OC fair. He was taking a picture of me in front of a giant mechanical butterfly at the insect exhibit. Playfully, he told me to pretend to be a butterfly, so I quickly lifted my arms, just in time to slap a 7 year old girl in the face. FML

by slappedright / 07/26/2011 at 7:19pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I accidentally slept in two hours later than I was supposed to. Today is my wedding day. FML

by badbride / 07/26/2011 at 1:11pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saved a honey bee from drowning in our pool. It promptly stung me and died. FML

by frankkathy / 07/26/2011 at 1:07pm / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, someone came over and told my mother, "I'm your son's friend Morris, I need to get something out of his car", so she gave him the keys. I have no friend called Morris, and now I don't have a sound system either. FML

by ceetee / 07/26/2011 at 9:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation

Today, I went shopping with my grandma. She went to the bathroom and was gone for a long while. I jokingly asked, "What happened, you fall in?" She did. She had shit all over the back of her shirt. FML

by Ima_Moronski / 07/25/2011 at 11:35pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Health

Today, my friends and I rented a party bus, which broke down on the highway 45 minutes into the ride. I paid the guy for the whole four hours. He said he was going to flag down a car to get someone to help us. We saw him get into a car and leave. FML

by tim12345 / 07/25/2011 at 12:08pm / United States / Money

Today, the police were canvassing my neighbourhood about a recent robbery. When I answered the door, my brother saw badges, panicked, and jumped out our apartment's third-storey window in an attempt to escape. He thought they were after him for using a bong two weeks ago. I'm related to this twit. FML

by Bec / 07/25/2011 at 10:10am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad taped a picture of me to the fridge with "Do not feed the she-beast" written on it. FML

by jgdgjyfg / 07/25/2011 at 3:21am / United Kingdom (Rotherham) / Health

Today, I learned that I'm allergic to hornets. I also learned that when your mom sprays a hornets' nest, and they come after you, that jumping in the pool doesn't help. They hover and wait for you to surface. FML

by sisi9999 / 07/25/2011 at 12:14am / United States (Georgia) / Health

Today, I saw a facebook status that said, 'Wedding today. Ugly people belong together.' I'm getting married today. FML

by ugly / 07/24/2011 at 10:53pm / United States (Florida) / Love