- Town/Country : Not specified
- Title : Madam
- Birth Date : Sunday 13 January 1991 (25 years old)
- <3 status : Single
- Number of visits : 819
- Number of comments : 0
- Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted
About cowtippinpeehand : Blahh.
About cowtippinpeehand : Blahh.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML
by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm / United States / Kids
Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML
by FML! / 08/06/2011 at 8:27pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML
by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 7:37pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
Today, my mom picked up my dog from the groomers. I came home to find a small female terrier on our couch. My dog is a full grown male maltese. What's worse is that it took me a full 20 minutes to convince my mom that she had picked up the wrong dog. FML
by Username / 08/06/2011 at 3:09am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by en3rg1zer21 / 08/06/2011 at 1:15am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 08/05/2011 at 3:06pm / United States / Health
by jbthedude / 08/05/2011 at 5:57am / United Kingdom (Dorset) / Health
Today, my parents woke me up at 4 am and informed me of their impending divorce. They then woke me up again three hours later and told me "never mind". This same routine happens several times a month. FML
by iloveryanhiga / 08/05/2011 at 5:27am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, my house was raided for drugs. I had to find out my father is a drug dealer. The cops then told me this wasn't their first time here, but it was the first time I was home to see it. They said it was nice to finally meet me. FML
by thehumanshield / 08/05/2011 at 4:41am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by dukebluedevils13 / 08/04/2011 at 9:47pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals
by Anonymous / 08/04/2011 at 7:19pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Money
Today, my daughter wouldn't stop yapping on about not being able to register on the new Harry Potter website. The amount of whiny jibber-jabber emanating from her cake-hole made me want to boot her from our family tree, and I had to resort to booze to wash the pain away. I'm a terrible parent. FML
by makeitstop / 08/04/2011 at 9:41am / United Kingdom / Kids
by Bobsaget00 / 08/04/2011 at 6:19am / United States (Ohio) / Kids
by localbarista / 08/03/2011 at 7:46pm / United States (Washington) / Work
by Teen With No Money / 08/03/2011 at 11:49am / United States (California) / Money