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countrygirl30

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countrygirl30
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  • Number of visits : 315
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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countrygirl30's favorite FMLs

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

#19207930
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26892) - you deserved it (8841)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, my girlfriend has a new obsession: grabbing my junk and whispering in my ear the song, "Baby, Imma Be Your Motivation." Problem? I get an instant boner and she only does it in public, because it's "funny as hell." FML

#18189501
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30795) - you deserved it (5843)

On 11/07/2011 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by InstantHardOn (man) - United States

Today, my boss made me run yet another stupid errand. When I delivered the paperwork to his office, I saw an email printout on his desk. Apparently, he has a plan in the works to get me "fried" next month. I'm not sure whether to give him a letter of resignation or a bottle of barbecue sauce. FML

#18088361
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21868) - you deserved it (2229)

On 10/27/2011 at 12:15pm - work - by last literate - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I went to the store to pick up some tampons. After waiting in line for about 10 minutes, the male cashier looked at me when I was leaving and said, "Have a nice... week!" FML

#18023767
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27598) - you deserved it (4288)

On 10/19/2011 at 3:36pm - misc - by sarah (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
431 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30631) - you deserved it (22432)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
431 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30631) - you deserved it (22432)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
431 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30631) - you deserved it (22432)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I spent about 10 minutes searching frantically for my cell phone, while holding it up to my ear and talking to my friend about my plans tonight. FML

#17934775
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8997) - you deserved it (35367)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

#17839569
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18838) - you deserved it (42232)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

#17839569
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18838) - you deserved it (42232)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

#17779717
423 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53210) - you deserved it (5251)

On 09/19/2011 at 10:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML

#17753266
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29766) - you deserved it (17168)

On 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I spent thirty minutes in the shower trying to remove "Pierre", a face complete with moustache that my girlfriend drew in sharpie on the tip of my cock. FML

#17628880
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25174) - you deserved it (9730)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I was caught and fined for picking a lock. I have OCD. I was picking the padlock on a toilet paper holder in a public toilet because the roll was the wrong way round. FML

#17487298
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28113) - you deserved it (11235)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by Anon - Australia (New South Wales)



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