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cottoncandymango

Offline (the 07/25/2015 at 6:40am) | Search for a member

cottoncandymango

29Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2594
  • Number of comments : 229
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About cottoncandymango : Movie enthusiast, ice cream addict, full-time chocolate lover, and procrastinator extraordinaire. I love Italian food, naps, and being happy. ♡

cottoncandymango's page activity

Visits<b>Hilda_x</b> - yesterday at 3:47pm<b>LPac5295</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 9:39am<b>xigxag</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 9:26am<b>insanelocket</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 9:31am<b>PlsNarwals</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 12:31am<b>Pokefinch27</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 12:01am<b>rich443</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 10:16am<b>hodula1</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 6:03am<b>ajlopez</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 10:46am<b>Envy22</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 10:34pm<b>joco4</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 6:29am<b>sugoi72</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 11:15am<b>ShroudedKnife</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 5:12pm<b>ianarnold</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 9:57am<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 4:42am<b>Bgreen94</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 7:02pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 3:37am<b>americanafrican</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 5:32pm

Fucked!<b>ajlopez</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 4:46pm<b>joco4</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 12:29pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 5:44pm<b>hai111</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 9:08am<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 10:59am<b>mattv88</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 11:04pm<b>AnonymousUser90</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 5:35pm<b>krishgad</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 3:16pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 2:12pm<b>alfonze07</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 4:52am<b>RA91</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 1:25am<b>imkool136</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 10:10pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 7:40pm<b>DrummerWS</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 1:47pm<b>Corey122726</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 12:39pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 3:21pm<b>kikoma</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:59pm<b>MrFloooo</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:54am

cottoncandymango's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of cottoncandymango's badges

cottoncandymango's favorite FMLs

Today, my spouse asked me if I could transfer some of the passion I have for buffalo wings into our relationship. FML

Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML

#20842045
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55352) - you deserved it (7199)

On 08/17/2013 at 6:56pm - intimacy - by frustrated - Ireland (Kerry)

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML

#20841635
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58696) - you deserved it (4964)

On 08/17/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by fsfs (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

#20837021
189 comments

Today, I was at a job interview for a position I really needed. Somehow, the interviewer and I started talking about fishing. I joked, "I'm a master baiter." Needless to say, I didn't get the job. FML

#20833743
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29916) - you deserved it (42067)

On 08/12/2013 at 1:11pm - work - by master baiter - United States (New York)

Today, my dog died. In the same kitchen corner that two of my other dogs have died. I have a "Corner Of Death" in my kitchen. FML

#20833377
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57727) - you deserved it (3643)

On 08/12/2013 at 4:17am - animals - by The Corner Of Death (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a dream in which I was being mugged. I started fighting the muggers off, while in reality, my fist smacked my wife in the face. Now she has a black eye, nobody believes my story, and they think I'm a wife beater. FML

#20832277
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53605) - you deserved it (5783)

On 08/11/2013 at 2:11pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, to help with my insomnia, I downloaded some relaxing rain MP3s and set them to loop. For the first time in ages, I fell asleep within minutes. Somewhere around 5, however, the sound of trickling water caused my bladder to empty itself all over my bed. FML

#20832201
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45901) - you deserved it (6538)

On 08/11/2013 at 1:24pm - misc - by just about pissed off (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, out of partying reflex, I downed Communion wine like a vodka shot. FML

#20830409
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24494) - you deserved it (47233)

On 08/10/2013 at 6:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from my son's kindergarten teacher. Apparently my son asked a girl to marry him. After she said no, he stabbed her with a fork. FML

#20829995
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63729) - you deserved it (5876)

On 08/10/2013 at 12:02am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I were fooling around, and things got heated. In the heat of things, I told him to tear my panties off. He took it literally and yanked at them with all his might. It's been two hours and I still can't walk straight. FML

#20827713
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51725) - you deserved it (19013)

On 08/08/2013 at 6:15pm - intimacy - by fuck my arse (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I went to my boss's dinner party. My sister, who also works with me, sat across from me at the table. I felt her kick me so I kicked her back. Then I heard something start crying. It was the boss's baby crawling under the table. FML

#20823157
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57857) - you deserved it (19541)

On 08/06/2013 at 1:07am - work - by offuckingcourse - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came home a little earlier than usual, only to walk in on my dad frantically trying to remove a ballgag from my mom's mouth. FML

#20822450
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54481) - you deserved it (5134)

On 08/05/2013 at 5:42pm - misc - by NO NO NO (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I was trying to explain to my mom that I've been having panic attacks. I ended up having a panic attack from talking about having a panic attack. FML

#20821432
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45019) - you deserved it (4704)

On 08/05/2013 at 1:11am - health - by seriously? - United States (Ohio)

Today, my father shot my fiancé. He's fine, but the wedding is off. FML

#20812145
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65508) - you deserved it (4522)

On 07/30/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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