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cottenstroer's FML badges
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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
cottenstroer's favorite FMLs
Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML
by Anonymous / 03/03/2011 at 6:22am / United States (California) / Work
Today, I told my boyfriend I was leaving him because he's cheating on me. He then told me he will die without me. When I said that I didn't care, he said 'OK. I'll kill myself!' and then held his breath in attempt to suffocate himself. I can't believe I dated this idiot. FML
Today, at work, my phone rang. My intern answered it and told me it was a coworker who'd just left. I picked up and said "What's up bitch? What are you going to complain about now?!" It was actually my boss. FML
by oheyimsarahh / 02/16/2011 at 10:30am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, it was both my and my stepmother's birthday. In preparation, my dad bought a huge banner with my stepmother's name on it, and a lovely birthday cake. When I told him it was also my birthday, he just grunted and taped a post-it note to the banner with my name on it. Same with the cake. FML
by stinkerweeder / 02/05/2011 at 3:30pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
by ad4 / 01/31/2011 at 6:11pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 11:46am / France / Transportation
by Anonymous / 08/14/2010 at 4:43pm / United States / Love
- Today, I finally went to talk to my neighbour upstairs. He is always throwing his cigarette buts on… Today, I discovered that dogs can menstruate. Today, I also spent an hour scrubbing a 3-foot-long… Today, I had to work a double shift as a server with a multi-fractured foot because my boss decided…