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cooterpie

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cooterpie

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3858
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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cooterpie's page activity

Visits<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 10:30pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 2:44pm<b>sehrgutmann</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 8:32am<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 11:14pm<b>FlowerMama</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 3:07am<b>kingpuppy18</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 5:47pm<b>thomashood</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 7:09pm<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 7:54pm<b>salamander461</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 10:43pm<b>6string_lady</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 8:24pm<b>sweetbliss3</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 12:33am<b>luvbeccaxxx</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 12:38pm<b>ironman49</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 6:01pm<b>Trish01</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 5:05pm<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 11:09am<b>P1Nk13</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 8:27am<b>itsadisorder</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 7:29pm<b>Andosworld</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 1:47pm

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cooterpie's favorite FMLs

Today, while socializing after a church service, I discovered I'm still referred to as "Fireshit's brother", after an incident a year ago which involved my sister screaming "the devil is coming out of my anus!" from the lavatory. FML

#14330238
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28897) - you deserved it (3128)

On 12/25/2010 at 1:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, my parents finally invited my boyfriend over for dinner. Everything was going great until my mother asked him his profession. He stuffed his mouth full of lasagna, snorted, and then responded, "I clean shit for a living." FML

#14256786
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14136) - you deserved it (21911)

On 12/19/2010 at 2:46am - love - by lovecrisis247 - United States (Texas)

Today, a man dressed as Santa Claus walked by me, grabbing my butt. He smelled of pipe tobacco and pee. He pulled me close to him and whispered, "I bet you're naughty but you feel so nice." I looked dumbfounded at him as he winked and yelled, "You're on my list." FML

#14208916
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37253) - you deserved it (3801)

On 12/15/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was driving with my dog. Looking out the half-open window he stepped on the switch, the window went up, causing his head to get stuck. I looked down and he had scared the shit out of himself, all over my shirt. FML

#14208425
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25613) - you deserved it (9248)

On 12/14/2010 at 11:24pm - animals - by fufu_mutt (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

#14187537
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99033) - you deserved it (5410)

On 12/13/2010 at 4:16am - health - by Christopher - Canada (Alberta)

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

#14187537
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99033) - you deserved it (5410)

On 12/13/2010 at 4:16am - health - by Christopher - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I met my boyfriend's very strict and traditional Korean parents. I had to listen to them while they called me a skank and how I was fat and ugly compared to nice, pretty, Korean girls. They don't know I speak Korean. FML

#14184009
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46711) - you deserved it (3027)

On 12/12/2010 at 10:03pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I met my boyfriend's very strict and traditional Korean parents. I had to listen to them while they called me a skank and how I was fat and ugly compared to nice, pretty, Korean girls. They don't know I speak Korean. FML

#14184009
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46711) - you deserved it (3027)

On 12/12/2010 at 10:03pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I called my parents from out of state to see if they would order me a pizza using their credit card online because I'm out of money. I haven't lived with them for the past year, and they still claim me as a dependent on their taxes. They said no. FML

#14115164
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12486) - you deserved it (26813)

On 12/07/2010 at 12:47am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, as I was walking into my apartment building, a douchebag leaned out his truck window and yelled, "HOW MUCH FOR A BJ?" He then pulled into a spot near my car. Apparently I have a charming new neighbor. FML

#14055521
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27800) - you deserved it (2466)

On 12/02/2010 at 12:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my parents found several drawings of a dinosaur girl in various bondage equipment posing seductively in my purse. The drawings weren't mine, nor do I have any idea where they came from, but my parents now think I'm a freak. FML

#14022064
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26352) - you deserved it (3372)

On 11/29/2010 at 9:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I was struck with a white-hot pain, and in the confusion thought her vagina had contracted hard. It turned out it was actually my uncircumcised penis retracting for the first time in my life. FML

#13975115
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24737) - you deserved it (6901)

On 11/25/2010 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend and I had great sex and afterward decided to take a shower together. He left the room to get some towels, so I went to the bathroom and wait. I walked out of his room wearing nothing but a thong and ran into his mom who had come home from work early. FML

#13894887
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14276) - you deserved it (29176)

On 11/19/2010 at 12:04am - intimacy - by kay_jay1819 (woman) - United States

Today, I bought one of my favorite albums from when I was growing up. When I looked at the liner notes, I learned that my favorite song on the album wasn't about taking a bath, but about going to a brothel. My second-favorite isn't about moving, but about suicide. My childhood just shattered. FML

#13873567
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23000) - you deserved it (5253)

On 11/17/2010 at 3:08am - intimacy - by nilssonfan (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was in McDonalds with some friends. When I got up to the register to order, the guy there appeared startled by me, and said, 'Whoa, you're really pretty.' No one has ever said anything like that to me before. When I told my friends, they laughed and said, 'Wow. He must have been drunk.' FML

#13836809
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29721) - you deserved it (3044)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:39am - misc - by ugly (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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