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coorosandor's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife has a bruise on her cheek from a nasty trip while practicing her yoga. She now thinks it's hilarious to flinch in public when I get near her, and keeps telling people she "walked into a door". I've gotten more dirty looks than I can count. FML


I agree, your life sucks (63869) - you deserved it (4970)

On 06/29/2014 at 1:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31862) - you deserved it (3486)

On 03/15/2012 at 7:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I shaved my beard off. Turns out the skin under my beard is six shades lighter than the rest of my face. I look completely ridiculous. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41107) - you deserved it (13632)

On 07/06/2011 at 12:59pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to let me give her a foot massage after she had a long day at work. Halfway through, she fell asleep. Wanting to see how ticklish she actually was, I started to tickle her feet. She then kicked me straight in the nuts whilst sleeping. FML

Today, I was kicked out of a Family Dollar. My mom thought it would be fun to press all the buttons on the musical ceramic cathedrals so they would all play at the same time. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22534) - you deserved it (2885)

On 11/10/2010 at 8:16am - misc - by dearprudence89 - United States

Today, my father was pruning the tree in our front yard. I was helping him collect the falling branches. At one point, a branch fell and I was under it. My father jumped to push me out of the way. Instead he pushed the branch into my face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25307) - you deserved it (2839)

On 12/29/2009 at 9:21am - misc - by patrickRafael (man) - Singapore

Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake me up by tickling my toes. I guess one of my reflexes acted out because I kicked her right in the face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (54367) - you deserved it (6182)

On 05/16/2009 at 7:26am - kids - by badmom101 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

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