About cooltatgar : An FMLholic.
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cooltatgar's favorite FMLs
Today, my husband finally admitted that he squandered the last three months of my share of the rent on booze. He then blamed me, demanded more money, asked for a divorce, and stormed out. When he returned he asked, "How am I the bad guy?" FML
by Anonymous / 10/15/2015 at 8:57pm / United States (Kansas) / Love
Today, I got nearly kicked out of the room I rent because I refuse to close my curtains at night. Apparently, my landlady thinks it doesn't look nice when people pass by and look. My room is on the third floor and I just want to see the stars. FML
by Anonymous / 10/15/2015 at 4:34pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by MozillaHostile / 10/09/2015 at 2:54pm / Canada / Animals
by isellorangez / 10/09/2015 at 2:27pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was running late for work. I forgot my name tag and work hat at home, but my boss is pretty laid back, so I wasn't worried about it. Five minutes into my shift, the district supervisor walked in for a surprise employee inspection. FML
by illuminatzi / 10/02/2015 at 10:32pm / United States (Georgia) / Work
by Anonymous / 10/02/2015 at 8:25am / United Kingdom / Work
Today, my little sister thought it would be funny to send my girlfriend a text saying I cheated on her and wanted to break up. Her response was "lol whatever I've been fucking Steve for like a month anyway". Steve is my brother, and he won't admit or deny it. FML
by Anonymous / 10/02/2015 at 6:22am / Australia / Love
Today, I had to stand up on a train for my 4-hour journey. Why? Two pregnant women flew into unbridled rage with me over sitting in the priority seating, saying I was selfish. I'm recovering from spinal surgery. FML
by hunchbackofnotredamn / 09/29/2015 at 4:33am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Transportation
Today, I thought my wife and I would reconcile after being separated for eight months. We ended up sleeping together after a dinner date, but she told told me afterwards that she still wanted a divorce. FML
by anon / 09/27/2015 at 11:27pm / United States (Florida) / Love
by DSCC / 09/27/2015 at 11:07pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals
Today, I was taking a long, relaxing, hot bath with my girlfriend after a long day. She had fallen asleep in my arms and everything was perfect - until I noticed the water around us had started turning yellow as she pissed herself in her sleep. FML
by itsbeenalongday / 09/27/2015 at 12:05pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by wifeofafainter / 09/24/2015 at 2:31am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by dormlyfe / 09/23/2015 at 10:23pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/23/2015 at 9:21pm / Canada / Money
Today, I was waiting in the McDonald's drive-thru and listening to some music. I was tapping my non-driving foot to the song when I accidentally tapped the wrong foot and rear ended the cop car in front of me. Whoops. FML
by stardustveins / 09/23/2015 at 9:14pm / United States (California) / Transportation
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, I was coaching some kids in table tennis when I told them to try a forehand loop, or smash.… Today, my best friend, who just got his drivers license, convinced me to take my dads brand new car… Today, I found out my sister is so cheap she used all the gas I put in the car to drive to the city…