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cookiesFTW

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cookiesFTW

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5782
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About cookiesFTW : Hello everyone!! I like to come on this site to read Fmls when I'm bored. I have good sense of humor, I'm really friendly and love cats. I do have hearing aids but that doesn't make me any different than anyone else.

Feel free to message me if you want to talk.

cookiesFTW's page activity

Visits<b>kaiboi702</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 6:57pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 12:35am<b>qdawg06</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 1:55pm<b>Horsempeg</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 9:45pm<b>veebz256</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 11:14pm<b>arasx0</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 9:05pm<b>clair1357</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 10:58pm<b>amandathecreator</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 9:05pm<b>yasmineseijmon</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 3:36pm<b>MDoremis</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 2:23am<b>nerovetsrethca</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 6:05pm<b>NessieMonster188</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 2:08pm<b>miichiii</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 12:54pm<b>Izzyduck07</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 1:41pm<b>Ley135</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 4:06am<b>devildog562</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 4:44pm<b>tyger_devlin</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 1:17pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 7:56pm

Fucked!<b>nerovetsrethca</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 12:05am<b>amandathecreator</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 4:11pm

cookiesFTW's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of cookiesFTW's badges

cookiesFTW's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking to the bus stop when someone slapped an innocent person in the face with a fish. I was that innocent person. FML

#18812835
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33334) - you deserved it (3503)

On 01/15/2012 at 5:24am - misc - by lolwtfbbq444 - Australia

Today, during swimming in PE, I kept noticing a stinging feeling on my scrotum. Every time I jumped into the water I would feel a sharp stab. After the full hour of hell, I went to the bathroom and looked in my new trunks. The designer had left their sewing needle in the crotch netting. FML

#18809719
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38971) - you deserved it (4403)

On 01/14/2012 at 10:07pm - health - by CantPublish - United States

Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML

#18802490
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26853) - you deserved it (8620)

On 01/14/2012 at 1:52am - intimacy - by haggisbowl - United States

Today, in preparation for proposing to my girlfriend, I borrowed one of her rings, so I could discreetly get her ring size. Not only have I now lost the ring, which turns out to be a keepsake of her dead grandmother, I still don't know her ring size. FML

#18795582
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14870) - you deserved it (39101)

On 01/13/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by machismo - United States (Ohio)

Today, my biology teacher assigned us partners for a project. I got paired up with one of the smartest kids in the class. When he found out I was his partner, he cried. FML

#18710808
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28859) - you deserved it (8001)

On 01/04/2012 at 10:07pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, while I was in the break room at work, one of my coworkers walked in on me playing with my animal crackers, complete with animal noises. Now, the entire department won't stop teasing me and calling me Tarzan. FML

#18687343
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13156) - you deserved it (33895)

On 01/02/2012 at 3:55pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my brother and I proposed to our girlfriends at the same time. We had perfect synchronization after practicing for days. My brother's girlfriend said yes, mine said no. FML

#18552373
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51396) - you deserved it (5000)

On 12/19/2011 at 10:40am - love - by emmmbo - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I had to take two buses home from a friend's house. After waiting in the cold for the second bus for 40 minutes, it finally came and I realized that I'd left my wallet on the first bus. It took me 2 hours to walk home and I was locked out because my house key is attached to my wallet. FML

#18541076
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30476) - you deserved it (7048)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:25am - misc - by Kayla (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33005) - you deserved it (2566)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I went to the pool with my new white bathers. I felt really good about myself because everyone was staring at me until this hot guy came up to me and said "Dude, your bathers are see-through. You need to shave!" FML

#18482444
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26397) - you deserved it (16699)

On 12/11/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by Embarrassed Swimmer (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got kicked in the crotch by a horse in my backyard. I don't own a horse. FML

#18444351
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33494) - you deserved it (2815)

On 12/06/2011 at 11:54am - animals - by Rash (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was watching porn when I heard my mom call for me. I closed my laptop right as she walked in my room. The sound, however, kept going. FML

#18428813
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18781) - you deserved it (42200)

On 12/04/2011 at 4:39pm - intimacy - by wowthatwould (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, the girl I've had a crush on for years asked if I could be her "emergency gay friend". Worst part? I said yes. FML

#18425208
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26278) - you deserved it (24081)

On 12/04/2011 at 3:36am - love - by lifesucksbigtimefuys - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML

#18398754
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33119) - you deserved it (3957)

On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband asked me if I was really pregnant or if I was just smuggling cheeseburgers. I'm now referred to as "the hamburgler." I'm only 5 months pregnant. FML

#18393059
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28178) - you deserved it (3434)

On 11/30/2011 at 9:57am - love - by preggers - Canada (Alberta)



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