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Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (90745) - you deserved it (9936)
On 05/14/2011 at 7:15am - intimacy - by ali grace - United States (Texas)
Today, I had to run a mile in gym class for fitness training. If it takes longer than 10 minutes to run the stretch, you have to re-take it. My time was 10:02. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30019) - you deserved it (16915)
On 05/13/2011 at 5:10pm - misc - by Alex (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my mom said she wanted me to get laser eye surgery before she did, "Just in case it isn't safe." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28298) - you deserved it (1952)
On 05/13/2011 at 3:18pm - health - by samadams42 - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I puked up a centipede. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44947) - you deserved it (5743)
On 05/11/2011 at 12:59am - health - by vaalcrawford - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my 12 year old son came home from school and informed me that he bought an air guitar for $20. He honestly thinks this is a good price. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27383) - you deserved it (9165)
On 05/10/2011 at 1:18am - kids - by Whatdididowrong? -
Today, I blacked out going up a roller coaster. Instead of helping me, my friend took pictures of my face and posted them on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25122) - you deserved it (5258)
On 05/09/2011 at 4:30pm - misc - by starcatch777 - United States
Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35514) - you deserved it (15868)
On 05/09/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by coldwetnose (woman) - United States
Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11374) - you deserved it (64572)
On 05/07/2011 at 11:29am - misc - by BCBUDDY - United States (Florida)
Today, having turned 18, I was eager to show my mother some of the clothes I'd like to purchase with my birthday money. I flipped my laptop open only to realise I had left a "Big Latina Booty gets a fat one" window open. Her howling screams of pleasure echoed through my kitchen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10589) - you deserved it (50456)
On 05/07/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by Anon (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)
Today, my husband told me that he's letting his mother move in with us. He told her it was alright without even consulting me first. I hate my mother in law so much that I'm contemplating divorce rather than living with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35305) - you deserved it (5892)
On 05/04/2011 at 1:41am - misc - by kayt240 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I went on a first date with a guy. He parked his truck and reached in his door side pocket and grabbed a little black zippered bag. Seeing this, I burst out laughing saying, "Wow, what's that, your change purse?" He replied, "No, I'm diabetic, this is my blood sugar monitor." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7909) - you deserved it (61815)
On 05/04/2011 at 1:33am - love - by Cuppycake (woman) - Canada
Today, I saw a car swerving in front of me on the freeway, so I whipped out my cell to report the DUI. As soon as it started ringing, I see police lights in my rear view and got slapped with a ticket for using a cell phone while driving. After explaining why, the officer said, "Nice try." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20079) - you deserved it (19126)
On 05/03/2011 at 1:22am - misc - by AE86Turbo (man) - United States (California)
Today, I came across an old man sitting on the pavement with a bottle of beer in one hand. He was crying. I thought I would be a good Samaritan and see if he was okay. After 15 minutes of hearing about how much his life sucked, he mugged me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27681) - you deserved it (7171)
On 05/02/2011 at 10:24pm - misc - by kimftwxox - United Kingdom
Today, my boyfriend and I went on a picnic. After we finished eating he laid down, closed his eyes, and put his head in my lap. At the exact second that I bent down to kiss him, he jumped up to get the Frisbee. We both have bloody noses. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22006) - you deserved it (2961)
On 05/02/2011 at 9:41pm - health - by wtf1234 - United States
Today, my girlfriend kindly broke the news to me that she doesn't want to take part in sexual activity anymore because it is getting too boring. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27537) - you deserved it (12284)
On 05/02/2011 at 4:26pm - intimacy - by beaverless - United States (Georgia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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