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Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and oil in the food she cooks for me because she wants me to be fatter than her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47237) - you deserved it (3020)
On 05/26/2011 at 10:24am - health - by fatteningmeup (woman) - United States
Today, I stopped to help a stranded motorist. I yelled out my window, "Hey do you need a hand?" The guy was just standing beside his car taking a piss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22133) - you deserved it (4786)
Today, my mom asked if I was seeing anyone. I launched into a description of my girlfriend, only for her to interrupt, saying that she meant a therapist, and the fact that I'd just made up a relationship was further proof that I needed one. I really do have a girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33046) - you deserved it (2952)
On 05/26/2011 at 3:53am - love - by lovingpsychosis - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)
Today, it was my birthday. Some 17 year olds will receive cars as presents from their parents. Mine, however, booked me a plot in the local graveyard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39174) - you deserved it (4276)
On 05/25/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Brilliant... (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, my boyfriend told me I looked pretty. I said, "Aww, that's the first time you've said that to me." He replied, "Well, it's the first time you've looked pretty." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39953) - you deserved it (6982)
On 05/25/2011 at 12:06pm - love - by Username - United States (California)
Today, I turned in an essay after staying up late to work on it. I was away when the teacher assigned it, so I'd asked my friend what the subject was. It transpires that she'd given me the wrong one, all because she was mad at me for not returning her pencil. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29961) - you deserved it (5191)
On 05/25/2011 at 7:34am - work - by oh dang /: -
Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45448) - you deserved it (13597)
On 05/25/2011 at 4:23am - intimacy - by katie -
Today, I went to a friend's wedding. While I was holding my four year old son, he managed to unclip the back of my dress and give the whole church a show. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27276) - you deserved it (3371)
On 05/24/2011 at 9:34pm - kids - by OhDear (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I found out that whenever I send my son to his room, he goes on his iPod and buys the most expensive apps he can find. So far I've been charged $600. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17418) - you deserved it (36389)
On 05/24/2011 at 8:02pm - kids - by StupidApple -
Today, I had to explain to my sobbing teenage daughter why you can't get pregnant from masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44962) - you deserved it (6761)
On 05/24/2011 at 6:29pm - intimacy - by asnolt (man) - United States (California)
Today, I refused to let two students into class because they were 15 minutes late. It turns out they were late because they had gone to buy me a birthday cake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9054) - you deserved it (59186)
On 05/24/2011 at 5:34pm - work - by LimeyGoodteeth (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)
Today, while I was walking home, I noticed an elderly man in a wheel chair trying to paint his garage so I went over to help. His response was verbal abuse and a slap to the face with a wet paint brush. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24416) - you deserved it (4448)
On 05/24/2011 at 1:54am - misc - by Adam -
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend gets a nose bleed every time he orgasms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31805) - you deserved it (3028)
On 05/24/2011 at 12:27am - intimacy - by nr1234 (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I went back to the key cutter for the second time because apartment key I gave to my boyfriend didn't work. The man cut me another key and apologised profusely. When I got home and tried the key, it didn't work. I realised I'd asked him to copy the wrong key. Twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5763) - you deserved it (27686)
On 05/23/2011 at 3:14pm - misc - by M (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)
Today, I received a visit from a social worker. My son told his teacher I was starving him, all because I refused to let him eat pizza and ice cream for breakfast. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32219) - you deserved it (3122)
On 05/23/2011 at 7:58am - kids - by Bad Parent -
Monday 20 May 2013
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