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Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17485) - you deserved it (44225)
On 06/01/2011 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, while I was sleeping, my girlfriend took my phone and set the ringtone to a bloodcurdling scream. I found this out when I received a call while driving to work and, thinking someone was being murdered in my backseat, I panicked and swerved into a parked car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31285) - you deserved it (3994)
On 06/01/2011 at 7:53am - misc - by iscreamforicecream (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I wrote in my own yearbook with different styles of handwriting so my mom would think I have friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44339) - you deserved it (11727)
On 06/01/2011 at 12:28am - misc - by nofriends - Japan (Tokyo)
Today, my boyfriend refused to take me out on our three year anniversary because he was busy, "training to become a professional gamer." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26696) - you deserved it (6319)
On 05/31/2011 at 8:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Brazil
Today, I was on my third date with a really hot girl. A guy walked by singing the Pokémon theme song. She started making fun of the guy, mocking his immaturity. I joined in order to keep the conversation going. Everything was going great but then my phone rang. It was the Pokémon theme song. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12364) - you deserved it (55768)
On 05/31/2011 at 1:05pm - love - by chickennbenchpress (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I came home from work to find my computer smashed into a hundred pieces. My dad threw it at my mom because they were having a fight and my computer was the closest thing to throw. He refuses to fix it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35920) - you deserved it (2064)
On 05/31/2011 at 12:44pm - money - by Taurus_ChicKa (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, I finally found out what that weird smell in my apartment was. My ex-boyfriend had been breaking into my apartment and hiding rotting fruit all over the place. I found this out when a ceiling panel fell and a swarm of fruit flies attacked me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28622) - you deserved it (3212)
On 05/30/2011 at 8:33pm - animals - by thiswouldonlyhappentome (woman) - Aruba
Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13519) - you deserved it (58357)
On 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm - intimacy - by yummy - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because of something I said 2 years ago, as a joke. I guess she took a while to get it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36249) - you deserved it (7002)
On 05/29/2011 at 12:41am - love - by Username - Canada (Ontario)
Today, it's memorial day weekend. The cops are all over the place watching for speeders and drunks. Some complete dickhead decided to spray paint "cop killa" on the side of my car. It won't come off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31828) - you deserved it (2183)
On 05/28/2011 at 8:46am - misc - by mperh - United States
Today, I was on my first blind date. We went to a fancy restaurant in the middle in the city. After using the bathroom, I came back to an empty table. He stole my purse and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31311) - you deserved it (10953)
On 05/28/2011 at 8:44am - love - by dancer_2014 - United States (Ohio)
Today, I finally told the girl I've been after for more than a year that I'm attracted to her. Her response? A slight hug with a pat on the back as she said "There, there." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27239) - you deserved it (3133)
On 05/28/2011 at 2:54am - love - by fedemere - United States (Florida)
Today, the girl I love made me text my best friend how much she loved him. This because her phone died. I was at the movies with her on our date. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31277) - you deserved it (4374)
On 05/28/2011 at 1:51am - love - by Fuckit - United States (Idaho)
Today, I was playing at a bingo hall, when I got a bingo for $50. I got so excited that I accidentally yelled, "Holy fuck!" They kicked me out. I didn't get the money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13865) - you deserved it (5657)
On 05/28/2011 at 1:27am - money - by greenhide8 - United States (North Dakota)
Today, a girl I've been crushing on for over a year finally gave me her number. I lost the note at home, but found it a few hours later. I excitedly called, only to find she'd written down the number for the local Pizza Hut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28043) - you deserved it (2990)
On 05/27/2011 at 7:30pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Monday 20 May 2013
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