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cookies61889

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3765
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About cookies61889 : Message me I always like talking to people
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cookies61889's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML

#16451971
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21628) - you deserved it (57540)

On 06/01/2011 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while I was sleeping, my girlfriend took my phone and set the ringtone to a bloodcurdling scream. I found this out when I received a call while driving to work and, thinking someone was being murdered in my backseat, I panicked and swerved into a parked car. FML

#16448607
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37515) - you deserved it (5200)

On 06/01/2011 at 7:53am - misc - by iscreamforicecream (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I wrote in my own yearbook with different styles of handwriting so my mom would think I have friends. FML

#16445488
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49735) - you deserved it (13435)

On 06/01/2011 at 12:28am - misc - by nofriends - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, my boyfriend refused to take me out on our three year anniversary because he was busy, "training to become a professional gamer." FML

#16441244
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32262) - you deserved it (7960)

On 05/31/2011 at 8:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Brazil

Today, I was on my third date with a really hot girl. A guy walked by singing the Pokémon theme song. She started making fun of the guy, mocking his immaturity. I joined in order to keep the conversation going. Everything was going great but then my phone rang. It was the Pokémon theme song. FML

#16435078
488 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15409) - you deserved it (73648)

On 05/31/2011 at 1:05pm - love - by chickennbenchpress (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came home from work to find my computer smashed into a hundred pieces. My dad threw it at my mom because they were having a fight and my computer was the closest thing to throw. He refuses to fix it. FML

Today, I finally found out what that weird smell in my apartment was. My ex-boyfriend had been breaking into my apartment and hiding rotting fruit all over the place. I found this out when a ceiling panel fell and a swarm of fruit flies attacked me. FML

#16424088
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33688) - you deserved it (3617)

On 05/30/2011 at 8:33pm - animals - by thiswouldonlyhappentome (woman) - Aruba

Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML

#16410366
406 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16635) - you deserved it (77042)

On 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm - intimacy - by yummy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because of something I said 2 years ago, as a joke. I guess she took a while to get it. FML

#16395878
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41472) - you deserved it (7555)

On 05/29/2011 at 12:41am - love - by Username - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's memorial day weekend. The cops are all over the place watching for speeders and drunks. Some complete dickhead decided to spray paint "cop killa" on the side of my car. It won't come off. FML

#16384217
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37622) - you deserved it (2864)

On 05/28/2011 at 8:46am - misc - by mperh - United States

Today, I was on my first blind date. We went to a fancy restaurant in the middle in the city. After using the bathroom, I came back to an empty table. He stole my purse and left. FML

#16384205
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37029) - you deserved it (14857)

On 05/28/2011 at 8:44am - love - by dancer_2014 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I finally told the girl I've been after for more than a year that I'm attracted to her. Her response? A slight hug with a pat on the back as she said "There, there." FML

#16382753
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33052) - you deserved it (4171)

On 05/28/2011 at 2:54am - love - by fedemere - United States (Florida)

Today, the girl I love made me text my best friend how much she loved him. This because her phone died. I was at the movies with her on our date. FML

#16382228
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36907) - you deserved it (5625)

On 05/28/2011 at 1:51am - love - by Fuckit - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was playing at a bingo hall, when I got a bingo for $50. I got so excited that I accidentally yelled, "Holy fuck!" They kicked me out. I didn't get the money. FML

#16381910
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17160) - you deserved it (41624)

On 05/28/2011 at 1:27am - money - by greenhide8 - United States (North Dakota)

Today, a girl I've been crushing on for over a year finally gave me her number. I lost the note at home, but found it a few hours later. I excitedly called, only to find she'd written down the number for the local Pizza Hut. FML

#16376796
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33438) - you deserved it (3963)

On 05/27/2011 at 7:30pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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