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cookies61889

Offline (the 03/03/2015 at 5:10am) | Search for a member

cookies61889

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4751
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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cookies61889's favorite FMLs

Today... I was mistakan 4 a prostituta. Twica. Whila in my work uniform. FML

#16551400
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35732) - you deserved it (7720)

On 06/07/2011 at 8:13pm - work - by Bee (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend got into my Facebook and cangd our relationsip status to single just to seiec of my friends would ( like ) it. After revealing to me wat se did, se now says I can no longer be friends wit anyoneo likd it. FML

#16550492
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39482) - you deserved it (5918)

On 06/07/2011 at 7:09pm - love - by fmfb - United States

Today.. . mah girlfriend and I were getting it on for the first time . Just as I was about to climax.. . I spotted mah greatest fear.. . a big wasp.. . only a few inches away from me . I shuddered and made a very unmanly orgasm wail . She now refuses to have sex because she says I "turned her off forever" . FML

#16548173
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40540) - you deserved it (10949)

On 06/07/2011 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by Punk (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend an I were making out when he sweetly whispered in my ear "it's not gonna suck itself." FML

#16541898
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46864) - you deserved it (11987)

On 06/07/2011 at 2:51am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today , I walked downstars , made a bowl of hot cereal , and held a full conversation with brother's grlfriend , before I finally putted two and two together and realized I hadn't putted any pants on. mega FML

#16541203
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11464) - you deserved it (25669)

On 06/07/2011 at 1:55am - misc - by mongoosemike -

Today... I Had Sex With A Juggalo. Fat FML

#16534562
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15386) - you deserved it (56403)

On 06/06/2011 at 7:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today I tougt it would be a good idea to declare ma love to te girl I ave a crus on . I guess I souldn't ave gone an kissd er witout warning because now ma face is coverd wit slap marks an I ad to explain myself at te police station fir sexual arassement .

#16531117
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12704) - you deserved it (49703)

On 06/06/2011 at 2:55pm - love - by Someguy (man) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)

Today, ma boyfriend and I were about to ave sex in is car. He got out of te car and moved to te passenger seat wit me. As e sut te door, it slammed against ma fingers, breaking one of tem. He ten asked if we could still ave sex. FML

#16530015
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43187) - you deserved it (6593)

On 06/06/2011 at 1:20pm - intimacy - by JayFri - United States

Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and window open. My dad fakd a robbery to see me freak out. FML

#16525233
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34624) - you deserved it (6461)

On 06/06/2011 at 3:06am - misc - by dwhite032 - United States (Indiana)

Yesterday, I was in the elevator with mah boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of mah life as we left the frst floor !! We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes !! FML

#16516164
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17577) - you deserved it (43063)

On 06/05/2011 at 4:45pm - misc - by - United States

I Bought A Dog To Make Me Feel Less Lonely. He Ran Away. FML

#16512093
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51691) - you deserved it (7482)

On 06/05/2011 at 8:23am - love - by Loveless - Canada (Ontario)

Today... I ran into mah ex-grlfriend from high school at the exact pizza shop we met at where I worked in high school. She broke it off with me after she caught me cheating with her best friend. looool These days... she's a lawyer who makes six figure a year. I still work at the same pizza shop. FML

#16495261
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11365) - you deserved it (113459)

On 06/04/2011 at 5:36am - love - by PizzaBoySwag (man) - United States (California)

TODAY, AT MAH JOB AS A LIFEGUARD, THE KIDS IN THE POOL DECIDD TO START A NEW GAME. THE GAME INVOLVD SPREADING OUT TO DIFFERENT PARTS OF THE POOL AND PRETENDING TO BE DROWNING AT THE SAME TIME. WHOEVER WAS "SAVD" FIRST, WON. FML

#16494046
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44172) - you deserved it (3277)

On 06/04/2011 at 2:15am - work - by zain - United States (Texas)

Today, ma dad cummad round to ta ousa. Looking ratar plaasad wit imsalf a pullad out is pona, grinnad, an cuckad it ovar to ma. I glancad at ta scraan to saa a nakad woman. Ha smilad an said "I tappad tat last nigt". FML

#16480333
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43559) - you deserved it (4600)

On 06/03/2011 at 6:17am - intimacy - by peaaaak (woman) - United Kingdom (Thurrock)

Today, my sister drove past meile i was walking ome in te rain, se onkd to let me know se was tere, and kept on driving. FML

#16480060
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36929) - you deserved it (3223)

On 06/03/2011 at 4:55am - misc - by myhairgetsfrizzywhenwet (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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