Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

cookies61889

Search for a member

cookies61889

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3373
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About cookies61889 : Message me I always like talking to people
Kik:cookies61889

cookies61889's page activity

Visits<b>Alpha21X</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 1:09pm<b>IrishKelp</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 7:08pm<b>erinlindon</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 9:47pm<b>mallak_rabaa</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 2:22am<b>Crlnprz</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 1:23am<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 12:16pm<b>Bola2nv</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 5:28pm<b>DarkCaesar</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:51pm<b>Haannahhh</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 10:59pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 9:05am<b>lindsay42711</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 9:56pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 3:25am<b>DevilsAltair</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 5:53pm<b>sarah1024</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 3:55pm<b>deathposts</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 4:10am<b>catella</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 11:59pm<b>jillytc</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 3:49pm<b>Sydd1799</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 11:07pm

cookies61889's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of cookies61889's badges

cookies61889's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents decided to visit me. When I first got my apartment I gave them a key "just in case" and today they used this key to enter when I didn't answer their knocking. I didn't answer because I was having sex with my boyfriend. My parents saw everything. They didn't know I was gay. FML

Today, my friend told me that semen was inflammable. Later at night I jacked off into a sock and then, excitedly, tried to lit the sock on fire. Turns out, semen is very much not inflammable. Naked, I shook my sock in the air so it would extinguish while my semen splashed out all over my room. FML

#3262847
372 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8903) - you deserved it (114679)

On 06/27/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by notinflammable (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my dad told me to take my stress out by getting a girlfriend. My mom laughed and said, "no that won't work, just go jack off in the shower again." FML

#54872
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42044) - you deserved it (4393)

On 02/16/2009 at 5:59pm - intimacy - by IBleedArbor - United States (Connecticut)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: