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cookies61889

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3819
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About cookies61889 : Message me I always like talking to people
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cookies61889's favorite FMLs

Today, my cab driver told me about the time he tried to commit suicide by driving off a bridge... while we were crossing a river. FML

#15470057
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39827) - you deserved it (3252)

On 03/24/2011 at 6:51pm - misc - by phantomdriver - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while vacuuming my car, I discovered a hole in the floor under one of the seats. Unable to figure out where it came from, I took it to a professional, who informed me that a family of rats has been making my car their home for the last several months. How lovely. FML

#15464818
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28674) - you deserved it (4476)

On 03/24/2011 at 11:03am - misc - by chi_chia - United States (Ohio)

Today, as I walked home, I heard the people behind me in an argument over my gender. FML

#15451762
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39825) - you deserved it (9798)

On 03/23/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by Cxisbest (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was playing with my dog. His bouncy ball rolled under the couch, and I got on my hands and knees to get it. He decided it would be a good chance to hump the shit out of me. FML

#15448080
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34516) - you deserved it (10806)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:21pm - animals - by Username - United States (Florida)

Today, I quit my job and sent a mass mail on Facebook that I was moving to a different state with my long time boyfriend. He called me later that night to tell me we aren't moving after all. Now we are both jobless with loads of bills to pay by the end of the month. FML

#15448003
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28167) - you deserved it (20710)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:16pm - love - by Username - Japan

Today, I locked the door to our only bathroom so my two year old wouldn't get in and make a mess. I crapped my pants while trying to unlock it with the key that rests on the frame. FML

#15447949
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16040) - you deserved it (31602)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by Cuzles (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I opened a cupboard and a brick fell on my head. The same brick my mum put up there to "keep it out of the way". FML

#15447390
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30795) - you deserved it (4010)

On 03/23/2011 at 11:22am - misc - by EllieJ -

Today, I got a call from this drunk man, asking for Celeste. Since I don't know any Celestes, I told him that he had the wrong number. He kept calling for her. Apparently he can't take a hint that she didn't give him her real number, and I get to deal with him. FML

#15447160
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29560) - you deserved it (2830)

On 03/23/2011 at 10:58am - misc - by jeanstein -

Today, I got a call from this drunk man, asking for Celeste. Since I don't know any Celestes, I told him that he had the wrong number. He kept calling for her. Apparently he can't take a hint that she didn't give him her real number, and I get to deal with him. FML

#15447160
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29560) - you deserved it (2830)

On 03/23/2011 at 10:58am - misc - by jeanstein -

Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him 'meow' over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML

#15442777
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22076) - you deserved it (62623)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:40am - intimacy - by Fcuked (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my boyfriend had a bad dream that a horse was biting his fingers off. He punched the horse in the neck, and in real life punched me in the spine. Twice. FML

#15410065
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32839) - you deserved it (3696)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:02am - love - by lily389 -

Today, some construction workers kept going in and out the door next to my cubicle. They decided it would be easier to just prop the door open for the next hour. It's 20 degrees outside, and I'm wearing a dress. FML

#14543942
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19987) - you deserved it (6100)

On 01/11/2011 at 9:45am - work - by bitty (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at the airport about to leave for my business trip. In the restroom, I put my purse on the edge of the sink and got my lipstick out. I leaned closer to apply my lipstick and my open purse fell into the sink, triggering the automatic faucet, filling my purse with water. FML

#6814532
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21504) - you deserved it (8829)

On 12/18/2009 at 6:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was on webcam with my boyfriend and absent-mindedly began sucking on a marker. He jokingly told me it was sexy, so I continued while making obscene gestures and moans. Suddenly he began to look nervous. I turned around to see my dad looking at me, disgusted and confused. FML

#6451435
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8346) - you deserved it (25178)

On 11/25/2009 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by NotSoSexy (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my brother came out of the shower and sat with my mom and me on the couch. He then says he liked the idea of the extra toothbrush in the shower, it helps him clean between his toes. I have been using that to brush my teeth for the last two weeks. FML

#5060700
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36293) - you deserved it (8808)

On 09/05/2009 at 1:29pm - misc - by uglychick (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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