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  • Number of visits : 1446
  • Number of comments : 82
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cookie_3008's favorite FMLs

Today, I was working at the checkout of a nearly empty store, so I picked up an empty box, closed my eyes, and slow-danced with it to the 80s love ballad playing on the radio. I don't know what's worse, dancing with a box, or opening my eyes to see ten or so wary customers waiting to be served. FML

#20161561
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7019) - you deserved it (29117)

On 11/13/2012 at 5:23am - work - by foreveralone (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's house to break up with her. It was a hard decision and both of us became quite emotionally overwhelmed at the time. We began to hug as a final goodbye, then her mum burst in the room and yelled, "HE FINALLY PROPOSED!" FML

#19725965
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36583) - you deserved it (3376)

On 06/03/2012 at 10:21am - love - by Matt - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I discovered that as thanks for my successful efforts to increase my company's monthly revenue, my dumbass of a boss has been awarded a pay bonus. He's wasted no time telling everyone about the sports car he's planning to buy with it. FML

#19699076
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18258) - you deserved it (1544)

On 05/29/2012 at 1:52pm - work - by vikts (man) - Luxembourg (Luxembourg)

Today, I found out that I am allergic to grass, and not supposed to mow lawns. My job is mowing lawns. FML

#19630951
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22751) - you deserved it (1966)

On 05/16/2012 at 3:36am - work - by jobless - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I called pizza hut to order a pizza. A voice recording was reading me their specials. The man had a horrible country accent so I began to make fun of it. Then I realized it was an actual person on the line. FML

#19281634
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6151) - you deserved it (43494)

On 03/15/2012 at 5:45am - misc - by muzikmaler91 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went with my friends to see a movie. I handed my student card over to the cashier as proof I was old enough to see it, and he started laughing hysterically at my picture. Then he called over a colleague, who also started laughing. FML

#19233268
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26141) - you deserved it (2578)

On 03/07/2012 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, my mother surprised me with a new alarm clock. It's attached to a toy car which races around my room with obnoxious sirens going at full blast until I crawl out of bed and turn it off. She says this will be a regular thing. FML

#19180349
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19024) - you deserved it (11510)

On 02/28/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by poop - United States

Today, my parents want me to become a lawyer, all because our family members keep getting into feuds and court cases. I'm a successful developer, and run my own company. FML

#18782870
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22242) - you deserved it (2145)

On 01/12/2012 at 5:14am - work - by me_the_maniak - India (Maharashtra)

Today, a friend told me over MSN that her father had died. Trying to express some solidarity, I went to send her a tearful smiley. I accidentally sent her the dancing pig animation instead. FML

#18644636
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17528) - you deserved it (27103) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/29/2011 at 2:32pm - misc - by Kevin - France

Today, my mom convinced me that she and my dad were getting divorced. I have anxiety problems, so I had a panic attack. She then laughed, and said, "Just kidding, I wanted to see your reaction. It's the best so far." FML

#18622971
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31461) - you deserved it (3385)

On 12/27/2011 at 4:42am - health - by somewhatlucky - United States (California)

Today, I tried to open the door with my mouth because my hands were full. I chipped a tooth. FML

#18622607
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8535) - you deserved it (39814)

On 12/27/2011 at 3:30am - health - by dumbbb - United States

Today, I tried to teach my dog tricks. Somehow, I thought it would be easier if I physically showed my dog how to roll, so I rolled on the floor in front of my dog. My sister recorded me and posted it on Facebook. Now everyone thinks I'm an idiot and my dog still can't roll. FML

#18324094
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15377) - you deserved it (20470)

On 11/23/2011 at 3:19am - animals - by bonertoolong - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML

#18272205
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32342) - you deserved it (4700)

On 11/17/2011 at 11:50am - work - by Chubby - United States

Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML

#18272205
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32342) - you deserved it (4700)

On 11/17/2011 at 11:50am - work - by Chubby - United States

Today, after years of training myself to crave healthier foods in order to lose weight, I found out that some of my favorite health-foods actually aggravate my hypothyroidism, and indirectly reduce my metabolism. Broccoli and soybeans are making me fat. FML

#18271623
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25735) - you deserved it (3173)

On 11/17/2011 at 9:34am - health - by healthfoodshmealthfood - United States (New York)



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