Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

connor98

Offline (yesterday at 4:28am) | Search for a member

connor98

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 2 November 1998 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 200
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About connor98 : Awesome

connor98's page activity

Visits<b>thexguyxnextdoor</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 1:56am<b>Sjus</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 7:51pm<b>CharlizeWasHere</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 1:45pm<b>tayza249</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 10:24am

connor98's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of connor98's badges

connor98's favorite FMLs

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

#20909921
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57109) - you deserved it (3376)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at my new job, some juvenile cockbite spiked my food with a laxative, as part of some kind of bizarre hazing ritual. The bastard got ratted out and suspended, but my arsehole now feels like it's been blown apart by a nuclear warhead. I thought this shit only happened in movies. FML

#20409224
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29544) - you deserved it (6155)

On 12/20/2012 at 4:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I approached a cute girl at a club, when she started barking at me like a rabid dog. Thinking she might be mentally unhinged, I left, only to see the same girl laughing her ass off with her friends minutes later. When I went back over, her friends started barking at me too. FML

#19739013
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24256) - you deserved it (5861)

On 06/05/2012 at 3:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

#1550190
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (178314) - you deserved it (45713)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I performed in my school play. Right before my big solo, I noticed a few girls changing backstage and I became aroused. The play was Jesus Christ Superstar, and I was playing Jesus. All I was wearing was a little cloth, so the whole audience saw Jesus get hard during the crucifixion. FML

#981592
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95091) - you deserved it (38946)

On 04/14/2009 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by jizzlemonster13 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was ringing an old man up in the local grocery store when I had realized all he was buying was 3 bottles of vodka and a box of condoms. While I was loading the bags into his cart he laid his hand on my shoulder and told me "I'd take you home with me but chances are I would be arrested". FML

#711978
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101379) - you deserved it (5273)

On 03/30/2009 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML

#357552
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (212687) - you deserved it (35178)

On 03/15/2009 at 9:14pm - money - by twit (man) - United States (Maryland)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: