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conivore723

Offline (the 01/16/2016 at 7:23pm) | Search for a member

conivore723

19Fucked!

conivore723conivore723
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 10 August 1999 (16 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 586
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About conivore723 : Hate these things. MI. Junior. Bananasantos is bae. Message me if you want to talk👍🏼

conivore723's page activity

Visits<b>NH_Freelancer</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 5:32pm<b>HRTreatman</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 10:31pm<b>WP40</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 6:58am<b>Aprill_cx</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 4:14pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 3:18am<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:50am<b>amer9298</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 4:13am<b>Ruskiy_Cherep</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 3:25am<b>p_diddy77</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 2:36am<b>xn3x</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 2:24am<b>urbandit</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 1:39am<b>pradip</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 1:29am<b>Mons</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 11:56pm<b>ham_spam</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 11:04pm<b>Tenker</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 10:52pm<b>justdoitalready</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 10:21pm<b>saltyacs</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 9:20pm<b>royr7395</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 9:04pm

Fucked!<b>HRTreatman</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 4:31am<b>delilablue95</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 3:22am<b>youngmuller1</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 2:55pm<b>TexasDiesel97</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 11:57am<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 2:50pm<b>perfect_heart13</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 11:02pm<b>melvasion</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 10:03pm<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 8:27am<b>z3r0d4z3</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 7:41am<b>mxgirl1998</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 7:22am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 8:18pm<b>ashleyyeah</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 5:32am<b>BananaSantos</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 5:57am<b>angelofmusic1895</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 11:08pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 3:34am<b>eyebrowzzz</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 10:08am<b>UserOfTheMind</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 5:46am<b>Amber_Naomy</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 1:32pm

conivore723's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of conivore723's badges

conivore723's favorite FMLs

Today, I dropped my phone in the toilet in a public restroom. That would have been bad enough, without the guy in the next stall saying, "Jesus! What the hell did you eat?!" FML

#21443162
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27144) - you deserved it (3279)

On 07/17/2015 at 7:04pm - misc - by AK-47 (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, most of my family was out of the house, so I took the opportunity to go to the bathroom and browse some porn. Five minutes later my sister comes and asks me to disconnect from bluetooth and that my "dinosaur noises" were blocking her and her friend's music. I'm currently hiding in shame. FML

#21441140
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25449) - you deserved it (12313)

On 07/13/2015 at 5:15pm - intimacy - by Nigel - United States

Today, I'm so deprived of intimacy that I got a raging boner when a waitress called me "hun". FML

#21418416
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32747) - you deserved it (5106)

On 05/31/2015 at 3:06am - intimacy - by bonehead69 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to my little sister strangling me. My parents accused me of making the red marks on my throat myself to exaggerate how bad it was. She's just "going through a phase", they say, and I'm a bad person for punching her to get her off me. FML

#21414899
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34608) - you deserved it (2165)

On 05/24/2015 at 11:15am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friends made a little game out of my OCD. They like to purposely poke one of my arms so I immediately poke the other one. They think it's hilarious and now do it constantly. FML

#21414073
88 comments

Today, my best friend can now say "I fucked your mom" to me and actually mean it. FML

#21397883
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46164) - you deserved it (3444)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

#21365242
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19722) - you deserved it (58507)

On 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my brother offered me $20 to practice his kissing on me for his date later this evening. FML

#21296136
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45588) - you deserved it (4531)

On 11/10/2014 at 11:31am - misc - by SisterOfTard (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I excitedly told my mom that I'm pregnant with my second child. She shot back, "You know what's a REAL achievement? Jacking your dad off in church last week without anyone noticing. Aim higher." I really didn't need to know that. FML

#21294899
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43773) - you deserved it (4018)

On 11/08/2014 at 6:02pm - kids - by jennabee97 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 9-year-old daughter was acting out and wouldn't do her homework. I told her that if she didn't study, she wouldn't get her acceptance letter from Hogwarts. She looked into my eyes, straight through to my soul and said, "Hogwarts isn't real, retard." FML

#21280509
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37717) - you deserved it (13774)

On 10/18/2014 at 3:29pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, while cuddling in bed with my drunk boyfriend, he kissed me softly then told me under no circumstances would he ever marry me. Then kissed me again. FML

#21272098
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43617) - you deserved it (4523)

On 10/06/2014 at 3:46pm - love - by kittenfish8903 (woman) - United States

Today, I was so desperately lonely that I begged a telemarketer not to hang up on me. FML

#21243162
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40196) - you deserved it (6529)

On 08/22/2014 at 2:04pm - misc - by lonely loser (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I confided to my grandma that I'm suffering from depression and I feel like a burden to everyone. She replied that her grandpa used to suffer from depression too, but that he'd cured himself in the end, namely by committing suicide. Thanks, grandma, thanks. FML

#21226890
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43180) - you deserved it (4043)

On 08/01/2014 at 4:09pm - health - by lacieQ (woman) - Canada

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Just as I was about to orgasm, he pulled away and said that my vagina is like a mask and that he feels like Bane from Batman. He's been talking in a Bane voice to my vagina for 30 minutes now. I guess sex is over. FML

#20586362
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64204) - you deserved it (11492)

On 04/12/2013 at 11:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I finally found out what that weird smell in my apartment was. My ex-boyfriend had been breaking into my apartment and hiding rotting fruit all over the place. I found this out when a ceiling panel fell and a swarm of fruit flies attacked me. FML

#16424088
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37522) - you deserved it (3925)

On 05/30/2011 at 8:33pm - animals - by thiswouldonlyhappentome (woman) - Aruba



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