Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 10/01/2015 at 7:23am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 76
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

coltybug's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of coltybug's badges

coltybug's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my husband and the cat licking the butter together. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21775) - you deserved it (1944)

On 09/24/2015 at 7:31pm - misc - by whatdidimarry (woman) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I had a complete and total Incredible Hulk meltdown when I realized that he had opened a bottle of very expensive whiskey, originally bottled by my great great grandfather in Scotland, and used it as a mixer with fucking Pepsi. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33855) - you deserved it (2334)

On 09/17/2015 at 3:48pm - kids - by Angus (man) - France

Today, it was my dad's retirement. He is traditional Japanese, so I had custom-ordered a samurai sword from a traditional Japanese blacksmith with dad's name engraved on the blade in kanji script. He loved it, right up til my drunk cousin tried to use it to cut down a tree and snapped it in two. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27113) - you deserved it (1496)

On 09/17/2015 at 7:13am - misc - by Ryoichi (man) - Germany

Today, I'm on vacation in Japan with my brother. When he said he could speak Japanese, I guess what he really meant that he's a dumbass weeaboo who only knows the words "kawaii", "baka", "sugoi" and a few others. He ended up offending two locals so much that they beat the shit out of us. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25339) - you deserved it (2986)

On 09/16/2015 at 1:16pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Japan

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me at his parents' house. I was overjoyed. His mom hugged me with tears in her eyes. His father, who never really spoke before, hugged me a few hours later when we were alone, his hands traveling to my ass and whispering, "I can change your mind." FML


I agree, your life sucks (70596) - you deserved it (4147)

On 07/17/2013 at 10:20am - misc - by ilivehere (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML


I agree, your life sucks (63692) - you deserved it (22495)

On 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm - intimacy - by needsnewshorts (man) - United States (California)

Scarlatine's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Scarlatine's illustrated FML
  • Are your abs well-toned and look like you’re made of metal? Feel like a machine ready to take whatever the crossfit fad can throw at you? Do you scream, ”Bro, do you Even lift?" at people during…

Monday 5 October 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: