coldkilla70

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coldkilla70

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1893
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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coldkilla70's page activity

Visits<b>colton_colton</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 4:56pm<b>xReDMemory</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 5:48am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 12:01pm<b>Severus_Always</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 11:16pm<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 4:43pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 4:24pm<b>Comet_Candy</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 12:32am<b>ChenEighty</b> - the 11/20/2013 at 12:02pm<b>soravsroxas</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 6:58pm<b>i_love_him_</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 9:33pm<b>Redthetrainer</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 5:58pm<b>Replicakes</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 11:06am<b>TheImaginarySong</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 11:56am<b>MissJennyale</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 9:08pm<b>Jannis</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 6:38pm<b>then000bster</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 11:01am<b>camsterjoe</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 11:02pm<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 10:58pm

coldkilla70's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of coldkilla70's badges

coldkilla70's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML

by ashamed father / 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML

by BakedBat / 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister found out that Justin Bieber got arrested and now she won't stop crying. 5ML

by Estee1024 / 01/24/2014 at 12:28am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend wants to make a video of us having sex for us to watch later and figure out how to improve our skills in bed. The problem is her choice of cameraman: her uncle. FML

by eastsiderounder / 12/02/2013 at 12:11pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

by MissYouPieceOfSkin / 11/27/2013 at 3:44am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML

by quit fucking up my life / 11/22/2013 at 8:08pm / United States (Alaska) / Love

Today, I was taken to the principal's office and bitched out about the dangerous weapon I brought to school. The "weapon" was a pocket fan. FML

by Anonymous / 11/22/2013 at 4:57pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched a little girl laugh while giving bread to some pigeons at a bus stop. A bus then arrived. All the pigeons moved out of the away, except one. Its head got crushed by a wheel, and some blood splattered onto the little girl's shoes, who then screamed. With laughter. FML

by B_and_W / 11/21/2013 at 6:35am / France / Kids

Today, while working at McDonald's, an angry customer called asking for his money back. Apparently we'd put 6 cheeseburgers in his bag instead of 5, he ate them all and now feels sick. FML

by cheyeahh6 / 11/17/2013 at 5:41pm / Australia (Victoria) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly, I said, "Spoiler alert: he dies." She threw a book at me and won't talk to me. I think she's serious. FML

by Thomas / 11/11/2013 at 12:20pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML

by fuck you, bitchcake / 11/10/2013 at 1:26pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML

by don'tdrinkthat / 11/03/2013 at 5:27pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, some kid asked me if I was Mexican. After I explained to him that I was actually Venezuelan, he simply snorted and said, "That's the same f*cking thing. If you speak Spanish then you're Mexican." FML

by Rinelric1998 / 10/30/2013 at 10:59pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML

by Anonymous / 10/20/2013 at 3:56pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, a customer was paying for his food. As he placed the money in my hand, he said, "Careful, those coins are sticky." I asked why. He replied, "You know, male stuff." FML