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code2264

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code2264
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1352
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

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code2264's favorite FMLs

Today, I was shaving off my beard for the first time in a very long time. I decided to have a little fun with it, and shaved my beard first into a goatee, then a handle-bar, then, finally, into a Hitler mustache. My electric razor dies. I don't have a normal one or an extra battery. FML

#597085
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34785) - you deserved it (79127)

On 03/25/2009 at 10:13am - misc - by nomorebeard (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was on a cruise and fell asleep next to the pool. I had an intense dream that I had fallen off into the ocean. I rolled off my sun chair into the water and woke up screaming uncontrollably, I thought I was in the ocean. I was in the kiddy pool. FML

#516952
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49199) - you deserved it (11024)

On 03/21/2009 at 8:06pm - misc - by nick (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I put my picture into a celebrity look alike website. The three matches that came up were Barbra Streisand, Hillary Clinton, and Boy George. I'm 16. I'm a boy. FML

#224033
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43442) - you deserved it (5585)

On 03/06/2009 at 1:09am - misc - by oconron (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up at 5:30 AM to my boyfriend flipping on the lights and shouting, "We have a problem!" Our chinchilla had gotten out of his maximum security cage, and half of our apartment is now underwater because he decided the water line that leads to the fridge would make a tasty midnight snack. FML

#208804
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48779) - you deserved it (8003)

On 03/04/2009 at 5:42pm - misc - by Sara (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
496 comments

I agree, your life sucks (213936) - you deserved it (73295)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my parents can see a screen-by-screen of everything I say and do on my computer. FML

#35844
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45007) - you deserved it (6496)

On 02/13/2009 at 4:57am - misc - by Yazzy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a movie with my boyfriend. In the lobby, I asked why the glasses were not working. I said, "Do they only work inside the theater?" My boyfriend replied, "3-D glasses just work inside the movie, everything else in the World is pretty much 3-D." FML

#29434
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8050) - you deserved it (110818)

On 02/12/2009 at 1:00am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I gave my girlfriend some non-alcoholic beer as a joke. In slurred speech, she told me I have the body of a monk seal. She then took my keys, staggered to my car, and drove away. She crashed into a tree two blocks later. She's fine. FML

#12195
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18760) - you deserved it (24051)

On 02/06/2009 at 6:54pm - misc - by IntimidatorStag (man) - United States (California)

Today, it was the first time I ever saw a vagina in person. It was during medical school training on how to do a pelvic exam. FML

#8388
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47603) - you deserved it (8843)

On 02/04/2009 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by medstudent (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, my friend's son asked me how much coke costs in this place. I told him "about a dollar?" He said "wow, that's really cheap for blow." He's 10. FML

#6869
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27689) - you deserved it (1935)

On 02/03/2009 at 6:55pm - kids - by Morgan (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was discussing my family heritage with my girlfriend's parents. The moment I told them that I came from a German background, her seven-year-old brother pointed at me and yelled, "HITLER!" FML

#3008
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18000) - you deserved it (1850)

On 01/28/2009 at 8:38am - misc - by razzmataz - United States (California)

Today, I had to give a speech in front of my class and during my speech I had to say the words "But six"; however, because of my accent it sounded like "Butt sex". For the remainder of the day I was frequently asked about "Butt sex". FML

#1040
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20209) - you deserved it (2349)

On 01/13/2009 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by Explicit - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to rent a DVD with my 85-year-old grandpa. I was walking around and then realized I was alone. I looked for him for quite a while until I finally found him open-mouthed in the porn section. FML

#356
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25260) - you deserved it (2241)

On 11/21/2008 at 7:53am - misc - by Kourou - Sent from mobile version



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