code2264

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code2264

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1888
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

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code2264's page activity

Visits<b>Takonas</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 8:55pm<b>jill97</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 8:33am<b>Mortoli</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 5:11pm<b>snorgia</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 11:58pm<b>Nerfherder69</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 3:14am<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 12:07pm<b>ChildRepellent</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 1:17am<b>hihello18</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 11:06pm<b>Wild_Marco</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 9:31am<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 11:27pm<b>paintballwarrior</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 10:23pm<b>SkiPort</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 9:20am<b>XxwhosawesoMExX</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 6:13pm<b>zant396</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 2:49am<b>ethereallight</b> - the 11/05/2010 at 8:30pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/08/2010 at 8:57pm<b>Niaa</b> - the 10/08/2010 at 5:37pm

Fucked!<b>Takonas</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 2:55am

code2264's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

code2264's favorite FMLs

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, during lunch at school, a wave of nausea came over me. I ran to the bathroom and made it just in time. As I was throwing up, I set off the toilet's automatic flush and my vomit came flying back into my face. FML

by sicktomystomach / 05/02/2009 at 1:05pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, in math class we were learning about gravity. To demonstrate my teacher asked me to stand on the desk and then step off. Upon stepping on the desk it curved inward and cracked. Everyone was dying of laughter. Fuck gravity. FML

by systeminitiated / 05/02/2009 at 12:55am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I was eating at Applebees at a high table with bar stools. I was reaching over to get some gum out of mom's purse when my chair flipped out from under me and my soda fell on top of me and got in my ear. To make things worse, the waiter ran over and shouted "I give that one a 10!" FML

by kate / 04/28/2009 at 9:39pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting ready for bed, when I decided to watch some porno on the computer. Suddenly someone from my messenger list says, "You might want to turn off the 'What You're Listening To' option if you're watching porn." I snapped and exited the porn. 63 people saw. FML

by Anonymous / 04/24/2009 at 4:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was home by myself. I was singing "If I Had A Million Dollars" really loudly since I figured no one could hear me. As I'm really into the song, my neighbor shouts, "If I had a million dollars, I'd give it to you to stop singing" and slams his balcony door shut. FML

by NotAmericanIdol / 04/23/2009 at 4:04pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the Apple Store taking random pictures of myself. I took one with a really stupid face. This girl passes by and says, "Wow, that's a cool effect! You look just like an alien!" I wasn't using any effects. It was a regular picture. FML

by sarah / 04/18/2009 at 4:46pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at the rehearsal for my wedding, my mother told my bride's mother to fuck off. FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2009 at 11:14pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on a small plane. A flight attendant told us that there was too much weight in the front of the plane and they needed 3 people to move to the back of the plane. I volunteer and walk to the back. She says, "Okay, we're going to need 1 more person." FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2009 at 12:39am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, a woman drove through my house. She was texting and eating watermelon at the same time. I didn't know that was even possible, but now my house is condemned. FML

by Fitz / 04/12/2009 at 9:53am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

by tool / 04/09/2009 at 2:03am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML

by StevieMe / 04/08/2009 at 10:48am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I logged onto my computer to access a video from my porn stash. However, the folder was empty except for my favourite file. Thinking that a virus deleted everything, I was thankful my favourite file remained. When I opened it, I saw a video of my parents telling me not to masturbate. FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2009 at 10:44am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I had my girlfriend over and we we're watching a movie in my basement. I run upstairs and pop a bag of popcorn. Later I come downstairs to find my 10 year old brother sitting next to my girlfriend saying," My brother always says he wants to screw your brains out, whatever that means". FML

by CaoNiMa / 03/26/2009 at 11:42am / China (Beijing) / Kids