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cobalt_light

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cobalt_light

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 3058
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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cobalt_light's page activity

Visits<b>Bush_Did_711</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 11:44pm<b>yeswecan</b> - the 07/01/2009 at 8:07pm<b>username666</b> - the 05/09/2009 at 8:51pm

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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

cobalt_light's favorite FMLs

Today, I took home my grandpa's ashes. I then went out with my grandma, leaving my 5-year-old at home with my 12-year-old. When I got home, my beaming 5-year-old opened the door, covered in white powder. My grandmother asked where all the powder had come from. She pointed to the empty ashbox. FML

#2980433
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47306) - you deserved it (17322)

On 06/17/2009 at 10:40pm - love - by fcnk (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friend told the cute waiter it was my birthday. He brought out a dessert with a candle and put a huge sombrero on my head. Everyone at the restaurant started singing me happy birthday. I got embarrassed and put my head down. My sombrero caught on fire. FML

#683803
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68312) - you deserved it (25079)

On 03/29/2009 at 5:08pm - misc - by Hotsauce887 (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mom was helping me clean out stuff from college. She opened a box and took out some anal beads I got as a gag gift. She asked, "What are these?" I answered, "They are for massaging your back". She then insisted I show her. I massaged my mother with anal beads. FML

#300638
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34107) - you deserved it (68863)

On 03/13/2009 at 9:48am - intimacy - by DanniRae (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

#279733
528 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61667) - you deserved it (332074)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

#279733
528 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61667) - you deserved it (332074)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I had to run to catch my train, so I didn't get the chance to buy a ticket. When the conductor was in sight, I saw he was a young man and I opened my top a little, in hopes of not having to pay a fine. When I told him I didn't buy a ticket he said: "Close your top, I'm gay". FML

#232857
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27254) - you deserved it (163452)

On 03/07/2009 at 7:03am - intimacy - by Mulee (woman) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, I had to run to catch my train, so I didn't get the chance to buy a ticket. When the conductor was in sight, I saw he was a young man and I opened my top a little, in hopes of not having to pay a fine. When I told him I didn't buy a ticket he said: "Close your top, I'm gay". FML

#232857
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27254) - you deserved it (163452)

On 03/07/2009 at 7:03am - intimacy - by Mulee (woman) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML

#221148
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70105) - you deserved it (4159)

On 03/05/2009 at 8:51pm - kids - by SadDad - United States (Florida)

Today, my very religious grandmother walked in on me masturbating. She's sending me to bible camp. FML

#197450
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78922) - you deserved it (27053)

On 03/03/2009 at 5:14pm - intimacy - by camp (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I drove my two kids to their friends' houses. In my convertible, looking what I though was my best, I slowed down outside a bar with cute 20 year old girls in front. My daughter noticed the speed reduction and said, "Keep driving dad, you're fat and mom left you for a reason." FML

#196936
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54696) - you deserved it (42363)

On 03/03/2009 at 4:27pm - kids - by Fat Dad (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, in the forest, I hit my foot against a half-buried metal thing. I dug into the ground, and found a beautiful box, heavy enough to not be empty. I imagined myself with gold coins. Inside was the corpse of a cat. FML

#1817
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29193) - you deserved it (6400)

On 01/20/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by mainche - Sent from mobile version

Today, well, last night, I told my girlfriend that I'm a light sleeper, and that the slightest disturbance will wake me up. As a result, this morning when I looked in the mirror I noticed a bunch of stuff written all over my body, like "You see, you didn't wake up!", "Nor now!". FML

#703
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8886) - you deserved it (30872)

On 01/04/2009 at 10:33pm - love - by titou - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I was taking my three year old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML

#142
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64172) - you deserved it (3806)

On 10/29/2008 at 7:57am - kids - by LifeSucks - Canada (Quebec)

Today, as I was taking my three year old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML

#142
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64172) - you deserved it (3806)

On 10/29/2008 at 7:57am - kids - by LifeSucks - Canada (Quebec)

Today, as I was taking my three year old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML

#142
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64172) - you deserved it (3806)

On 10/29/2008 at 7:57am - kids - by LifeSucks - Canada (Quebec)



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