cmbhunter

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Offline (the 02/02/2016 at 12:28pm)

cmbhunter

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 270
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About cmbhunter : I love to play the violin. I love to listen to rock music like five finger death punch but I am also partial to some occasional dubstep. I love animals and had the chance to raise an abandoned squirrel. :)

cmbhunter's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of cmbhunter's badges

cmbhunter's favorite FMLs

Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML

by damn it rose / 05/31/2014 at 9:40am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Love

Today, due to a combination of boredom and a faulty hair dryer, I now have singed pubes and burned balls. FML

by testacular / 03/25/2014 at 5:20pm / United Kingdom (Plymouth) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be cute to put his penis through a doughnut and try to make me eat it off. FML

by lovely / 02/26/2014 at 1:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Devastated, I told my dad about it, hoping he'd help cheer me up. His advice was, "Just rub one out son, you'll feel better in no time." Thanks dad. FML

by Author / 02/24/2014 at 5:22pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2014 at 1:49pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, after a big argument, my girlfriend looked me dead in the eyes and said "I can go the rest of my life without sex, you know." 5ML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2014 at 3:24pm / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend was spending the day at my place. Later on, I walked in while she was making lunch. She had a jar of mayo in her hand, and I joked, "I have some mayo, but it doesn't come from a jar." She had a bluetooth headset on, and was in a call with her father. 5ML

by Anonymous / 01/23/2014 at 7:10pm / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend started whispering "blowjobbbb" into my ear while we were watching a movie. When I asked him what he was doing, he denied ever saying it and claimed it must have been a subliminal message in the movie. FML

by Subliminal message / 01/19/2014 at 6:21pm / Switzerland / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

by flavored / 11/18/2013 at 10:26am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend's response to me saying "Most women like a bit of filth in the bedroom every now and again" was to start farting in bed. Not quite what I meant. FML

by roughsexgonewrong / 11/05/2013 at 1:01pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML

by tony456 / 07/11/2011 at 5:08pm / United States (Vermont) / Intimacy

Today, my football coach thought it would be a good idea to get drunk, run to the other sideline, and scream, "WELCOME TO SPARTA, BITCH!" This would've been funny if he weren't also my dad. FML

by spartanson / 04/28/2011 at 6:28am / Miscellaneous

Today, I made heart shaped cookies for my girlfriend. My mom's reaction? "They look like dicks." FML

by adam / 02/14/2010 at 9:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy