Search for a member

Offline (the 01/29/2016 at 9:10am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 34161
  • Number of comments : 1525
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

cmac86's page activity

Visits<b>142857</b> - the 10/12/2016 at 2:38pm<b>LiquidGoldRose</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 6:35am<b>28actress</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 6:41am<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 11:29am<b>Aerosmith71</b> - the 08/30/2016 at 7:25pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 12:53pm<b>christophbak</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 6:18am<b>Snip_Snap</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 3:13am<b>CREA</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 8:43pm<b>queen_jae614</b> - the 06/29/2016 at 2:13am<b>Muskrat777</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 9:04am<b>raven83</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 8:01pm<b>Joshawott14</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 8:18pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 5:18am<b>tisvana18</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 12:03pm<b>BananEnigma</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 6:03pm<b>nopenopenopeneva</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 12:07am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 9:25pm

Fucked!<b>Vegan_Cannibal</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 5:12pm<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 8:14am<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 11:22pm<b>16bees</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 4:13pm<b>Melharr</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 8:26pm<b>pitbull3k</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 11:13am

cmac86's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.


Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of cmac86's badges

cmac86's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML

by sheyo / 03/04/2009 at 8:13pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, it is my twin sisters and my birthday. We both wanted a day at the spa for our birthday. My sister got a gift certificate to the spa, while I got mouthwash and a $20 gift card to Target. My mom said it would cost too much to make me pretty also. FML

by Kensie / 03/04/2009 at 4:48pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

by Señor Guapo / 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, at a red light, an old lady crossing the street fell right infront of my car. I got out of my car to help her. The light turned green and I was still helping the woman to her feet. An officer came by and ticketed me for "impeding the flow of traffic." FML

by VroomVroom / 03/04/2009 at 10:50am / United States (Hawaii) / Transportation

Today, I went to visit my fiancé's dying grandmother in the hospital with him. She started talking to us about living each day to the fullest. His grandmother points to me and says, "Life is short. That's why you don't waste any time screwing girls who look like that." FML

by joAnne / 03/03/2009 at 4:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents left for work before I had to leave for school and I decided to skip. I stayed by the phone, expecting the school to call so I could pose as my parent and excuse my absence. The phone rings and I pick up. It's my Mom, calling to leave my dad a message on the machine. FML

by noway6000 / 03/03/2009 at 11:49am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarreah in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping form and he rolled over to whisper, "I heard everthing." FML

by ohmygoodness / 03/02/2009 at 4:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, my roommate and I finally got fed up with this increasingly, horrible stench that has been in our apartment for a few days now. Leaving it for our other roommates to handle, we selfishly left to get yogurtland. Moments later, we both expressed that we haven't seen our cat in a while. FML

by pacificbeach / 03/02/2009 at 4:32pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend, whom I was madly in love with, by having a plane fly over her house spelling "Marry me Abby?". After seeing this, she locked herself in her room and cried for 4 hours exclaiming that this wasn't how she wanted to be proposed to. I had invited my entire family. FML

by groomfail / 03/01/2009 at 8:41pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Love

Today, after working for my company for 10 years, my co-workers threw me a farewell party. The boss gave quite an eloquent speech, ending in "we're really gonna miss you Mark." My name is Evan. FML

by Grrrrr / 02/28/2009 at 7:50pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, my fiancée broke up with me. Via a myspace message. While we were in the same apartment. FML

by loser / 02/28/2009 at 7:22pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I went to get a sports physical at a hospital. My nurse was morbidly obese and unattractive. She told me she would go through the tests listed on the sheet. She did everything, including feeling my genitalia. When it was done, I read over the sheet. Genitalia wasn't a test listed. FML

by TahRah / 02/28/2009 at 4:58pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

by ihavepinkbackpac / 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

by thatsucks / 02/28/2009 at 6:10am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love

Today, after soccer practice, I was walking to the car with my dad. My team mates waved and said "Bye POTHEAD!" They call me that because they think my head is shaped like a pot. Of course, my dad didn't believe me. I'm grounded now because I have an abnormally-shaped head. I've never smoked pot. FML

by ap84 / 02/27/2009 at 4:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous