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clyde

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clyde
  • Town/Country : US of A
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 831
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About clyde : just me, and nothing but.
btw, my name isn't clyde.
it's christina.

clyde's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

clyde's favorite FMLs

Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML

#4674126
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14712) - you deserved it (34430)

On 08/20/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was working the lighting for a drama production. In the last scene, two characters realize they are in love and kiss, then the stage goes dark. I mixed up my settings, and instead of a blackout, flashing party lights started going off. 300 people turn around to stare at me. FML

#4285773
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12001) - you deserved it (25598)

On 08/04/2009 at 4:22pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was getting mugged. In shock, I said, "Are you mugging me?!" To which the mugger responded, "Duh, do you think I grabbed you for your looks?" FML

#4274462
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42443) - you deserved it (6316)

On 08/04/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went to a bookstore and asked the sales woman,"Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. FML

#4271664
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14495) - you deserved it (37885)

On 08/04/2009 at 12:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of thinking up random names, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML

#4201087
390 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59665) - you deserved it (12178)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:44am - love - by NinjaPanda88 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a shower when my boyfriend suddenly hopped in with me. We were getting a little frisky when my mom's hand unexpectedly came through the curtain, and dropped a condom in the bottom of the shower, all the while saying, "Keep it safe kids!". FML

#3932433
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47939) - you deserved it (21912)

On 07/21/2009 at 3:45pm - intimacy - by uh-oh (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I finally had sex with a girl I've been dating for over a month. Before we got started she told me not to worry about the birth control because she could handle that. So after we finished I asked her what kind of birth control she used. She said she meditated. FML

#3211870
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28958) - you deserved it (54709)

On 06/25/2009 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by UrbanCass (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my wife and I watched a documentary film about a kid living with severe asthma. In one scene, the kid has a severe asthma attack, and is rushed to hospital. My wife started laughing hysterically at this and after apologising, goes "it's just he sounded exactly like you in bed." FML

#2302795
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57251) - you deserved it (5717)

On 05/26/2009 at 4:24am - intimacy - by Weezylover (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, my daughter said "I love you mom", to me for the first time I can remember. She is 16 years old. She said it because I bought her first thong. FML

#1509670
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53580) - you deserved it (8260)

On 04/30/2009 at 10:50pm - kids - by mylove (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I gave my sister a stun gun for her birthday since she recently had a couple "close calls" walking home from work late at night. She was so excited and thankful that she wanted to express her gratitude by shocking me to see if it really worked. FML

#1446877
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47278) - you deserved it (12442)

On 04/29/2009 at 1:39am - misc - by PoopTart (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend was wearing a new shirt he had bought over the weekend. It was really cute and I always borrow his shirts so I asked to borrow his new one. He replied with, "Okay but please don't stretch this one." FML

#1387702
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40643) - you deserved it (12034)

On 04/27/2009 at 10:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend was wearing a new shirt he had bought over the weekend. It was really cute and I always borrow his shirts so I asked to borrow his new one. He replied with, "Okay but please don't stretch this one." FML

#1387702
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40643) - you deserved it (12034)

On 04/27/2009 at 10:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to the mall with a couple of friends. While walking through the parking lot, we saw a very dirty car. You couldn't even see the inside of the car through the windows. I thought it would be funny to trace on the window, "Wash Me." After doing so, the driver got out of the car. FML

#1280254
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7059) - you deserved it (44972)

On 04/24/2009 at 12:38am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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