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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I called security at my school because I left my mittens in a classroom and it was locked. When the security officer showed up, he asked if the mittens I was looking for were the ones on my hands. I even had to take one of them off to call them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7338) - you deserved it (40921)
On 02/05/2013 at 12:24am - misc - by swarm20 - United States (Minnesota)
Today, at a friendly get-together, my friend's husband had too much to drink and got into a fistfight with my husband. I'm seven-and-a-half months pregnant, and the friendly get-together was my baby shower. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23534) - you deserved it (1992)
On 02/05/2013 at 12:22am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, working as a nurse, I saw a patient in for follow-up after a partial leg amputation. I checked her blood pressure and gave her the reading, which prompted her husband to ask what it meant. She replied, "I'm alive." Before I could stop myself, "And kicking" spilled out of my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19766) - you deserved it (6200)
On 02/04/2013 at 10:30pm - health - by facepalm - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my co-worker told me that I need to quit smoking because it was making me look and smell horrible. I've never smoked in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22437) - you deserved it (2417)
On 02/04/2013 at 7:42pm - health - by Mattrd - United States
Today, my friend asked me to fix his laptop for him because it is loaded with viruses. When I turned it on and started searching for the problem, I couldn't find it. Luckily I was able to find a video of him banging my girlfriend. We've been together for eight years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56282) - you deserved it (2004)
On 02/04/2013 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by hamandegger (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45197) - you deserved it (2511)
On 02/04/2013 at 12:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, after heavy rain my street flooded. While in my living room, I looked outside to see that my elderly neighbour was outside splashing in a knee deep puddle. He was butt-naked and wearing a snorkel and flippers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22261) - you deserved it (2188)
On 02/04/2013 at 4:15am - misc - by Stunned (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)
Today, I hired out a motel room so I could stay there by myself and lie to my mother and grandmother about having friends. This is the third time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25961) - you deserved it (12116)
On 02/04/2013 at 2:45am - love - by lonelyloser - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I had a half-hour conversation with my parents about going to college. I don't know what's worse, that they were trying to talk me out of it or that they're convinced that I'm going to get knocked up and drop out by the end of my freshman year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21419) - you deserved it (2063)
On 02/04/2013 at 2:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)
Today, I was dragged to a Super Bowl party. While there, the host's kid threw 3 cups of apple sauce at my feet, which then exploded and covered my jeans. 10 minutes later, the host's wife announced that she was pregnant with twins. All I could come up with was, "You're making more!?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (26227) - you deserved it (3983)
On 02/04/2013 at 12:15am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was washing the dishes at work. I had to pee really bad but first I wanted to finish the dishes. A coworker jumped out from behind the ice machine. I screamed like a girl and pissed my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19661) - you deserved it (3577)
On 02/03/2013 at 10:50pm - work - by klovemachine (man) - United States
Today, after nearly 5 months of trying for a baby, I found out my wife has continued to take the pill as it gave her a better idea of her cycle and thus when she'd be "most fertile". FML
I agree, your life sucks (30831) - you deserved it (2543)
On 02/03/2013 at 9:17pm - intimacy - by jdrew32 - United Kingdom (Liverpool)
Today, the guy that I've liked for a while but never had the courage to talk to was wearing a TARDIS shirt. I jokingly asked, "Are you the Doctor?" His response was for me to "Go away, f***ing nerd." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26487) - you deserved it (2769)
On 02/03/2013 at 9:16pm - love - by guessnot (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was given a wedgie by a complete stranger in a crowded bar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20342) - you deserved it (1730)
On 02/03/2013 at 8:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my mom accused me of stealing money from her purse. Being totally innocent, I reminded her that the only other person with access to it is her boyfriend. She said she trusts him because she loves him. They've been dating for 2 months. I've been her daughter for 25 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31381) - you deserved it (1399)
On 02/03/2013 at 7:26pm - money - by :/ (woman) - Netherlands (Gelderland)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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