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claiiire

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claiiire
  • Town/Country : baton rouge, usa
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 8 October 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 1921
  • Number of comments : 280
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About claiiire : 19, college student. Message me if you want to conversate and such, promise I'm nice.
Sorry I'm not very photogenic.

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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claiiire's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to clean up the urine puddle left by one of the regulars who plays the poker slot machines at the bar where I work. Rather than reserve the machine to go to the bathroom, she literally sits in her own piss to mark her territory. This happens about every second day. FML

Today, for my birthday, my family offered to take one of my friends to the movies with me. I had to pay a random person in my class to pose as a friend of mine, so that I wouldn't look pathetic in front of my parents. She forgot my name three times. They didn't buy it. FML

#19913768
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15575) - you deserved it (19819)

On 07/09/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by Nofriends (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, the mailman delivered my new phone to my neighbour's house. This was okay, because he left a note in my mailbox informing me so. Now my crazy neighbour won't give me the package because, "*I* signed for it!" FML

#19673305
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18003) - you deserved it (1226)

On 05/24/2012 at 3:30pm - misc - by Byebye - Netherlands (Groningen)

Today, I had to yet again tell my mother-in-law that I wasn't going to name my unborn baby "Ermintrude" after her late mother. My husband told me to stop being difficult, and that he agrees that it would be nice. FML

#19326389
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27051) - you deserved it (1944)

On 03/22/2012 at 1:14pm - kids - by futuremum (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I got a Facebook message from the school genius/nerd, who I have never talked to. He politely informed me that after much thought and deliberation, he has narrowed it down to who his ideal mate is. Me. FML

#18819143
425 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24914) - you deserved it (6034)

On 01/15/2012 at 10:30pm - love - by geeklove - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had shelves installed using a builder who came highly recommended by my co-worker. Turns out the builder is her friend, who has no actual qualifications or experience as a builder, but 'it's his dream'. I now have a gaping hole in my kitchen where the shelves should be. FML

#18719100
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19208) - you deserved it (4416)

On 01/05/2012 at 7:37pm - misc - by neveragain89 (woman) - Australia

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

#18716043
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30102) - you deserved it (8628)

On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, it was my first day as a vacuum salesman. While I was demonstrating how well it removed stains, I managed to smear stuff over the area I was cleaning. So not only was I unsuccessful in removing the original stains, I left them with worse carpet than when I got there. FML

#18451587
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8173) - you deserved it (21447)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:29am - work - by JB - United States

Today, I helped myself to a small glass of cocktail from the fridge, not realising it was alcoholic. I told my mom what happened. She made me drink salty water until I vomited so I wouldn't get "alcohol poisoning". I'm 19. FML

#18417411
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24477) - you deserved it (5646)

On 12/03/2011 at 5:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my car broke down because someone stuck a dildo in the tail pipe. I'd parked in my driveway. FML

#18069827
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27720) - you deserved it (2913)

On 10/25/2011 at 1:58am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my fiancé has been jumping out of closets and from around corners with a video camera, trying to catch me naked. He says he wants to post a video online so his old high school friends can "rate" me. I'm now afraid to get intimate, shower, or even change my clothes in my own home. FML

#18023382
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34444) - you deserved it (4175)

On 10/19/2011 at 2:19pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my fiancé has been jumping out of closets and from around corners with a video camera, trying to catch me naked. He says he wants to post a video online so his old high school friends can "rate" me. I'm now afraid to get intimate, shower, or even change my clothes in my own home. FML

#18023382
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34444) - you deserved it (4175)

On 10/19/2011 at 2:19pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while leaving a football game, I saw a half-empty bottle of Mountain Dew on the ground. It was night-time and there weren't many people around, so for a laugh, I picked it up and tossed it behind me as hard as I could. It hit someone. FML

#18008863
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6378) - you deserved it (46198)

On 10/17/2011 at 6:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years felt comfortable enough with me to disclose that he had previously spent 4 years in a mental institute because he tried to kill his mother. He also told me we will be together forever. I'm scared. FML

#18005142
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49865) - you deserved it (4637)

On 10/17/2011 at 6:02am - love - by bubba - China

Today, I heard that a boy in my class had written a song about me. Intrigued, I went to see him perform. I spent 3 excruciating minutes listening to a song about 'the girl of his dreams', his tear-filled eyes staring into mine the whole time. I have to sit next to this freak for the next 2 years. FML

#17488999
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13626) - you deserved it (47484)

On 08/16/2011 at 9:20am - love - by worried (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)



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