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cl4ptp

Offline (the 06/18/2015 at 6:04am) | Search for a member

cl4ptp

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 January 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1618
  • Number of comments : 70
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 3 posted

About cl4ptp : I'm crap at writing these things, feel free to message me :)

cl4ptp's page activity

Visits<b>Zombinosh77</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 10:26pm<b>Fidge86</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 10:26pm<b>cfende02</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 12:09am<b>ashkwalliy</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 10:39am<b>thebeast74</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 1:00am<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 9:38pm<b>sdroze1389</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 7:53pm<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 10:09pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 4:57pm<b>chrisstachon</b> - the 09/30/2013 at 11:57pm<b>kitkat3308</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 1:27am<b>weedxmanx420</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 3:38pm<b>chamay</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 8:02pm<b>Mshrodes</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 10:33pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 1:23am<b>ajax_united</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 1:48pm<b>xSwirll</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 1:26pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 1:35am

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cl4ptp's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the bathroom and my pee split into 4 different streams, none of which actually hit the toilet. FML

#14540407
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27475) - you deserved it (6555)

On 01/11/2011 at 12:32am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was applying some Icy Hot to my sore thighs, when I accidentally got a little on my dime sacks. For the next hour, it felt like someone had lit a match under my plums. FML

#14345671
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10982) - you deserved it (24588)

On 12/26/2010 at 12:59pm - health - by person - Jordan (Amman Governorate)

Today, it took me a full ten minutes to finish on the toilet. I was babysitting at the time, and it took the kids those ten minutes to destroy the kitchen and shave the cat. FML

#13840378
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28208) - you deserved it (7579)

On 11/14/2010 at 12:18pm - kids - by nicki - United States (Illinois)

Today, I have a busy day of college work ahead of me. I figured I'd best have a good breakfast. Then I realised I'd completely ran out of food except for various types of sauces and condiments. So what am I having for breakfast today? That's right. A nice cup of Gravy. FML

#13416322
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11411) - you deserved it (27397)

On 10/12/2010 at 2:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML

#9643258
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43196) - you deserved it (7793)

On 04/05/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Hate2Date (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found out exactly what Ducolax stool softener is all about. Holy colon cleanse Batman! FML

#8797519
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6033) - you deserved it (21135)

On 03/03/2010 at 11:34am - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I sneezed with so much force while I was driving that I whacked my head on the steering wheel and honked the horn. FML

#7268268
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23871) - you deserved it (4068)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:37pm - misc - by Hayley (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, the instructions on my new IKEA bed made me cry. It includes a picture of a person working alone with a frown crossed out and is replaced by two smiling people working together. I have no one in my life to help me. FML

#7036461
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39203) - you deserved it (4441)

On 12/30/2009 at 2:07pm - love - by hatelife (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at work, I brewed myself a fresh cup of coffee. I set the hot coffee onto my desk. My phone rang so I answered my coffee, spilling it all over my face and body. FML

#6902851
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11940) - you deserved it (25718)

On 12/23/2009 at 1:42pm - work - by chris (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the plant in my kitchen that I have been watering for almost 2 years is fake. FML

#6453438
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10258) - you deserved it (50744)

On 11/25/2009 at 9:41pm - misc - by IlikeGreenPlants (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was at a party where I ate a bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

#6298765
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19109) - you deserved it (32978)

On 11/14/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by swedishdude (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, my parents had a fight, which is a pretty normal occurrence at our house. But today, they fought over an orange. Dad is now sitting in his bedroom with the aforementioned orange. FML

#6003671
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29496) - you deserved it (2256)

On 10/26/2009 at 6:15am - misc - by Roida (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was having a really bad day and told my friend at lunch about how stressed I was and he gave me his brownie to cheer me up. After school, he texted me "Did the brownies kick in?" Yes, they did, right in the middle of my English presentation. They were "funny" brownies. FML

#5171509
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45933) - you deserved it (6989)

On 09/10/2009 at 5:34pm - misc - by englishclasshigh (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend and I were starting to get in the mood. I get on top of him, lean down to kiss him, and he begins to laugh. Puzzled, I ask him why. He tells me that when I'm naked and on top of him, I remind him of a cow, with 'udders' . Offended, I go to get off. 'No no' he protests, 'a SEXY cow'. FML

#4936228
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35145) - you deserved it (4927)

On 08/30/2009 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by sigh (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)



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