About chutney_02 : Hello
I'm generally a happy smiley person, but messages make me happier *hint* *hint*
I wish people could give the skill of great commenting as presents...
About chutney_02 : Hello
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chutney_02's favorite FMLs
by concom / 05/27/2015 at 3:40pm / Cyprus / Miscellaneous
by Malina / 01/03/2015 at 8:42pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Animals
by seriously / 12/17/2014 at 8:33am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
by anonymous / 12/11/2014 at 8:17pm / United States (Florida) / Health
by mn167109 / 12/09/2014 at 12:45am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, I decided to tan naked in a secluded part of my yard, so I wouldn't get tan lines. I even felt adventurous enough to leave my bikini and towel inside. This idea backfired however when my mom stopped home from work, assumed I wasn't home, and locked all the doors before she left again. FML
by Anonymous / 07/13/2014 at 12:08am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I collected a package from a handsome UPS guy. We exchanged smiles, and he even noticeably checked me out. I was feeling really confident for the first time in a while. Then I went inside and saw that I had two huge breastmilk spots on my chest. FML
by BBeffedmylife / 06/14/2014 at 10:18am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by deservedly / 06/09/2014 at 12:28pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work
Today, I was cooking dinner for my children, managing for once not to screw up and hurt myself. Then, while chopping vegetables, I accidentally sliced my finger open. The same finger that was still covered in juice from a lemon I'd just squeezed. FML
by 5p4571k / 05/25/2014 at 1:35pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
Today, I took my driving test. I had pulled out of my three point turn in a neighborhood and started driving again, thinking something wasn't quite right. The lady testing me looked over at me and said, "Sweetie, you're driving on the wrong side of the road." FML
by Lindsey / 05/24/2014 at 11:22am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I nervously flirted with a very cute guy. Being a little overweight, I rarely think cute guys will go for me. This line of thinking was yet again correct when he casually pulled his sleeve up revealing a tattoo of a pinup girl with a "NO FAT CHICKS" sign below it. FML
by nofatchicks / 05/12/2014 at 7:49pm / United States (Florida) / Love
Today, an old man wanted to give me a tip for bagging his groceries. He slipped some money as deep into my pocket as he could, stroking my thigh for a few long seconds in the process, then he gave me a creepy smile and winked before walking away. FML
by Anonymous / 05/08/2014 at 3:00pm / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML
by STOP / 05/08/2014 at 9:55am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
Today, my toddler found my daughter's recorder from 3rd grade and figured out how to play the highest pitch note. Of course, my daughter pulls out her trombone to have a jam session. And I'm out of ibuprofen. FML
by missmom83 / 04/24/2014 at 11:28am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids
Today, on a train, I nearly choked while sleeping with my mouth wide open. The little old lady sitting opposite me was entertaining herself by throwing little pieces of balled-up tin foil into my mouth. FML
by Anonyme / 04/24/2014 at 2:57am / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Transportation
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my bosses words, "Abided by company policy to such an…