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Today, I was watching Pokémon with my daughter when she told me that I reminded her of her favorite Pokémon. Feeling good about it, I asked which one. She pointed to the screen and said "Snorlax!" The fat and lazy one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15124) - you totally deserved it (3708)
On 11/15/2009 at 8:45am - kids - by dessaye (woman) - Singapore
Today, I was putting my contacts in when my daughter decided to jump on me from behind to scare me, causing me to poke myself in the eye. I'm now wearing an eye patch due to a scratched cornea while my daughter is singing some song titled "You are a pirate". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16767) - you totally deserved it (1241)
On 11/13/2009 at 5:06am - kids - by dessaye (man) - Singapore
Today, I got a call from my ex asking if I could fix her computer. I brought my 7 year old son with me. On the way I told him, how I hated her, but I can't be rude. Once we get there, I say to her "it's nice to see you." My son says "but I thought you said you want her to fall off a bridge?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (3911) - you totally deserved it (22087)
On 11/08/2009 at 8:08pm - kids - by Dan (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I microwaved a cup of soup. While walking back to my desk to eat and do homework, I noticed a message that said, "WARNING: Hold cup by sides, as lid may not be secure." At that exact moment, the lid that I was holding fell off and the soup drenched my Nintendo DS, and printer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5866) - you totally deserved it (20746)
On 10/20/2009 at 1:44pm - misc - by Omi (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, while driving home from work an old homeless man stepped out on front of my car. As I slammed on the brakes the man threw a bag of poo at my windscreen and shouted "Praise The Lord!" before carrying on as if nothing had happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27496) - you totally deserved it (1525)
On 10/08/2009 at 5:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I told my daughter how her eyes look exactly as pretty as my wife's. She told me that she loved the way my eyeballs stick out of my face, just like Elmo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22542) - you totally deserved it (2239)
On 10/03/2009 at 8:33am - kids - by dessaye (man) - Singapore
Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37351) - you totally deserved it (5953)
On 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm - love - by mandy (woman) - United States (California)
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