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Offline (the 07/05/2015 at 7:27pm) | Search for a member
About chrisstachon : Hi. My name is Chris. I'm 19, 5'9" also a hundred percent Polish. Definitely call myself a gamer. I have a dog named Ginger. I love "House/EDM" music but I listen to pretty much everything. My Instagram chris_nightwing, My Steam id Chagonxd(PC gaming Application). Well if you're still reading this description and want to know more about me send me a message and ask. Or just say "hi", "hey", " hello", or something goofy to make me laugh.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Today, my boyfriend called me while I was at work. He sounded very excited and told me he had a surprise for me. He doesn't usually do this kind of thing, so I was excited. When I came home, I found him naked, with "Bone Appetite" written right above his penis. FML
Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML
Today, my family and I were driving and we passed a strip club called DB's Golden Banana. My 5-year-old sister asked what it was, so my dad said it was a place where people dance. Now my sister keeps telling people she wants to be a dancer at DB's Golden Banana. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He's Latino, so I thought he'd like it if I made a bit of noise and called him "papi" while we did it. It freaked him out enough to kill his boner, and now he thinks I have some kind of incest fetish. FML
Today, I was rock climbing. I had my equipment on and I saw a really cute girl. I went for the hardest climb in the gym, and while jumping up to grab the rock, I simultaneously farted, missed the rock, fell to the mat and broke my arm in the process. FML
Today, I was shopping for a new deodorant, and this guy was standing in the way. He wouldn't move, so I crouched down to get the one I wanted, right when he did the most violent fart right in my face. Then his wife came over, made a face and he whispered, "I think that girl just farted". FML
Friday 3 July 2015