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chrilin13

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chrilin13
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  • Number of visits : 42
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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chrilin13's favorite FMLs

Today, when I went to the shopping centre, the automatic door wouldn't open for me. I had to stand there and wait until someone else walked by to open it for me. I suffer from dwarfism and this is a daily occurrence. FML

#21118654
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38891) - you deserved it (2823)

On 04/21/2014 at 12:11am - misc - by shorty (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend drove 20 miles to come see me. The closest we got to intimacy was him showing me how he could unlock his iPhone 5s with his penis. FML

#21118643
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30930) - you deserved it (4141)

On 04/21/2014 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Iowa)

Today, at a big Easter egg hunt, the kids found a wild bunny. Everyone smiled and "aww"ed, until my dog caught and ate it in front everyone. FML

#21118358
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32622) - you deserved it (3763)

On 04/20/2014 at 7:24pm - animals - by BetterThanChocolate (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was babysitting a 9-year-old kid, when she got thirsty and asked for a drink. All I could find was some kind of Mexican fruit drink, but I didn't realize until too late that it was actually hard liquor. I had to scrub her mouth out with toothpaste and put her to bed to cover it all up. FML

#21116530
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21392) - you deserved it (36915)

On 04/18/2014 at 5:31pm - kids - by cantprovenothing (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, due to my short temper, I punched myself in the nose because I wouldn't stop sneezing. FML

#21116112
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18650) - you deserved it (46297)

On 04/18/2014 at 7:09am - health - by Ow (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, after ten years, our sewing machine broke. My mom tried to return it back to the store she bought it from. FML

#21115731
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32499) - you deserved it (2930)

On 04/17/2014 at 7:24pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46561) - you deserved it (4060)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking around school alone and felt someone tap my back. I laughed and turned around to find no one was there. I felt confused when I felt the tapping again, which is when I chose to yell at the nearest person, "What?!" I later found out it was a bottle in my backpack tapping me. FML

#21112284
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30151) - you deserved it (9574)

On 04/13/2014 at 9:32pm - misc - by ohmygod582 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went to a veterans' reunion party with my grandpa. While there, a guy started yelling at me for having an unapproved haircut. It was my grandpa's old drill sergeant, and he thought I was in the army too. Everyone just smirked as he forced me to drop and do push-ups. FML

#21110214
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31742) - you deserved it (4708)

On 04/11/2014 at 10:51am - misc - by Gomer (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was feeling horny, so I told my boyfriend, who lives 30 minutes away, that "I really needed him". He replied, "Did you fall in the toilet again?" FML

#21107872
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39869) - you deserved it (8465)

On 04/08/2014 at 7:06pm - intimacy - by that girl (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, while showering, I pulled on my white exfoliating gloves ready to wash my face. As I was about to use them, a dark stain caught my eye so I sniffed the mark only to discover it was poo. After further investigation, I find out my younger sister had been wearing them and 'experimenting'. FML

#21104331
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39796) - you deserved it (3606)

On 04/04/2014 at 10:17am - kids - by AshleyP - United Kingdom

Today, it's the last day of my sign language class. At the end of the class, my teacher surprised us by speaking for the first time, also surprising everyone that she wasn't actually deaf. It wouldn't have been so bad had I not just given someone an answer to the test, thinking she couldn't hear me. FML

Today, my girlfriend and I were snuggling and we placed our hands together, palm to palm. I can bend the tips of my fingers over hers, which apparently surprised her because she commented, "Huh, so big hands AREN'T related to penis size." FML

#21101616
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45367) - you deserved it (5598)

On 04/01/2014 at 2:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, fed up with my nerdy appearance, I got my hair shaved off, hoping for a Walter White kind of look. I didn't think it was too bad, but not even an hour later, I'd already been called a "fat Bruce Willis" and compared to a freshly circumcised penis. FML

#21092620
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32684) - you deserved it (6514)

On 03/21/2014 at 12:10pm - misc - by richard (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had an elaborate fantasy of what I would do if I became a cat and how I would make my way to my crush's house to be their cat. FML



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