Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

chlorinegreen

Online | Search for a member

chlorinegreen

14Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5075
  • Number of comments : 371
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About chlorinegreen : My name is Sarah
I'm 23
My grammar sucks
If you feel the need you may message me but I don't reply often.
Have a wonderful day other FMLers!

Sarah

chlorinegreen's page activity

Visits<b>DougK76</b> - yesterday at 5:00pm<b>roche71190</b> - yesterday at 7:32am<b>oceanbrickfire</b> - yesterday at 6:29am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 11:53am<b>dude20141</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 9:57am<b>ernievaldez12</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 8:10am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 11:13pm<b>WH1T3B0YH4ZSW4G</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 11:09pm<b>Hertyn</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 6:09pm<b>twinsfan1999</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 5:33pm<b>AlovesW</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 5:18pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 4:30pm<b>Valiantonias</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 4:27pm<b>MortenM</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 4:12pm<b>Coachjoost79</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 4:01pm<b>LikeIceLikeFire</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 2:45pm<b>perrysld</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 12:29pm<b>ipeewheniwee</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 12:00pm

Liked!<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 11:30pm<b>christofferkamal</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 6:18pm<b>alphasmartass93</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 7:37pm<b>whatshisname1066</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 7:12pm<b>zeklen</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 4:58pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 2:29pm<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 9:34am<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 1:01am<b>IceMan11</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 3:05pm<b>IamHercules</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 2:53pm<b>DanboiRowe</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 5:09am<b>FiendHunter</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 3:39am<b>RA91</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 11:16pm<b>WeChaseClouds</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 4:32am

chlorinegreen's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of chlorinegreen's badges

chlorinegreen's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that, due to the walls at my uni dorm being ridiculously thin, my entire flat overheard me lose my virginity. Spanking and all. FML

#21344108
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23020) - you deserved it (7302)

On 01/25/2015 at 5:10pm - intimacy - by Orgasmataz (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, at dinner, my downstair's neighbors described how they can listen to most of my movements, including the buzz of my phone when I text late at night. I think all of us knew it is not my phone that vibrates at that time. FML

#21343273
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27357) - you deserved it (4337)

On 01/24/2015 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car. We were in the front seat and I was on top. My ass hit the horn and scared my boyfriend so bad, he jumped, causing me to hit my head so hard that I swear I got a concussion. FML

#21341327
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27199) - you deserved it (9995)

On 01/20/2015 at 11:10pm - intimacy - by chelse_elyce - United States

Today, my crush was giving me a ride home. As we pulled up to my house, he looked into my eyes with a sweet smile and said the words every girl wants to hear - "Do you give head?" FML

#21339980
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33691) - you deserved it (5214)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:35am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother told me how long it took for her to have me. Not how long she carried me in her womb - how long it took her and my dad to have sex. FML

#21339798
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26986) - you deserved it (2194)

On 01/18/2015 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by -.- - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I ran out of cash. The nearest ATM to my house is over a half hour away by foot. After walking all the way there under the blistering heat of the sun, I realized I'd left my card back at home. FML

#21339623
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18134) - you deserved it (19924)

On 01/18/2015 at 2:44pm - money - by saqmuel093 (man) - Malaysia (Sarawak)

Today, I went to gather the laundry out of the dryer. My daughter had seen my wife put bleach in the washer, so she decided that honey in the dryer would make the clothes smell sweet. She wasn't wrong, but now I have a giant ball of sticky socks and underwear. FML

#21331413
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25475) - you deserved it (2209)

On 01/05/2015 at 4:26pm - kids - by Synonymous_Rex - United States (California)

Today, I found out my 7-year-old daughter really did lie about my husband's "other girlfriend" as revenge for being grounded, and that he never cheated on me at all. We're well into our divorce proceedings and he won't forgive me for not believing him when he denied it. FML

#21327839
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23334) - you deserved it (42308)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:00pm - kids - by skanula414 (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I was trying on wedding dresses with my future sister-in-law who is a little bigger than me. We tried on a similar dress and she said it looked better on me because I'm skinny. Instead of saying, 'No way' or 'It looks great on you', I accidentally said 'Yeah, I know'. FML

#21327629
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17907) - you deserved it (30623)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:47am - health - by bridezilla - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of six years. She got mad at me, saying she is too young to get married and that I was trying to ruin her career. She is 32 and works part-time at a grocery store. FML

#21322620
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33943) - you deserved it (2739)

On 12/23/2014 at 10:24am - love - by got any coupons? - United States

Today, my boss heard a rumor that I was in a relationship with a fellow co-worker. He assured me that inside relationships weren't against any store policy, so I confirmed it. He then fired my boyfriend anyway. FML

#21318814
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30721) - you deserved it (4836)

On 12/16/2014 at 10:31pm - work - by thankssomuch - United States (Maine)

Today, I finished a painting I'd spent 3 weeks working on for an exhibition. When I came back from lunch, my cat was perched above it on my desk. He looked at me, then down at the painting, then jumped down onto it. He slipped and smeared the wet paint everywhere, ruining the whole thing. FML

#21317384
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31299) - you deserved it (5298)

On 12/14/2014 at 3:28pm - animals - by I'm Trading Up For A Dog (woman) - Finland (Western Finland)

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

#21315694
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35397) - you deserved it (4278)

On 12/11/2014 at 4:47pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter wasn't feeling well, so we allowed her to sleep in bed with us. She snuggled right up with my husband. I felt a little jealous until she turned around and cuddled with me, just long enough to throw up all over me. She then flipped back over and snuggled with her dad. FML

#21314569
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32452) - you deserved it (3266)

On 12/09/2014 at 5:39pm - kids - by SickMaMa - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend made me a milkshake. It was pale yellow with some black spots. He told me it was banana and poppy seed. After drinking it, he told me they weren't poppy seeds. They were his pubes. FML

#21313388
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36910) - you deserved it (4332)

On 12/07/2014 at 9:12pm - misc - by pubemilkshake - United States (Utah)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #11
  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: