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chizzam

Offline (the 08/22/2014 at 8:05am) | Search for a member

chizzam

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 931
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About chizzam : Hi Im not really sure what i want to put here yet so yeah

chizzam's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:33pm<b>Evii</b> - the 04/08/2011 at 8:25pm<b>bella789</b> - the 03/31/2011 at 7:18am<b>sweet_candy_</b> - the 02/17/2011 at 12:39am<b>fluffingclouds</b> - the 02/13/2011 at 10:26pm<b>mesnugglez</b> - the 12/08/2010 at 8:05pm<b>Lisa_Gaskarth</b> - the 12/08/2010 at 8:26am<b>vasya</b> - the 12/07/2010 at 12:05pm<b>catherine012</b> - the 12/05/2010 at 11:40am<b>BelleElle</b> - the 10/14/2010 at 9:33am

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You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

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chizzam's favorite FMLs

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

#20537010
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20483) - you deserved it (59866)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

#17338982
330 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43401) - you deserved it (14499)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:58am - kids - by ohcrap - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had to give a reference for a former employee. I tried to say he was always willing to give us a hand on the job. Instead, I said he was always willing to give us hand-jobs. FML

#16448858
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16407) - you deserved it (27770)

On 06/01/2011 at 8:35am - intimacy - by Username - Canada

Today, I was on my third date with a really hot girl. A guy walked by singing the Pokémon theme song. She started making fun of the guy, mocking his immaturity. I joined in order to keep the conversation going. Everything was going great but then my phone rang. It was the Pokémon theme song. FML

#16435078
488 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15387) - you deserved it (73607)

On 05/31/2011 at 1:05pm - love - by chickennbenchpress (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on a blind date at a fancy restaurant. My date was running a bit late, so I went ahead and got a table. I got bored, so I decided to ask my waiter how I looked. He stood there, then said that "it's against company policy to mock customers to their face." FML

#16326196
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35570) - you deserved it (7554)

On 05/24/2011 at 9:59am - misc - by BurnedByAWaiter -

Today, after being annoyed one too many times by my students' whiney attitudes, I accidentally blurted out, "Quit being such a bitch," to the superintendent's daughter. FML

#16017887
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21597) - you deserved it (41225)

On 05/02/2011 at 10:30am - work - by MathTeacher (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was watching a movie online. There was a 15 minute ad. 13 minutes into watching an ad about birth control, I noticed that there was a "skip this ad" button in the corner. FML

#15949369
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12289) - you deserved it (47692)

On 04/27/2011 at 2:33pm - misc - by popcorn - United States (California)

Today, I noticed this guy crying in the park. I went up to him to see what was wrong. Apparently his girlfriend broke up with him, and he also said he wanted to kill himself. My first response was "Don't, you'll regret it later in life". FML

#15869241
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30529) - you deserved it (12278)

On 04/21/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by alopez1994 -

Today, I told my son that his grades are dropping and his behavior is getting out of hand. To which he replied, "Yeah, so is your weight." FML

#15843459
334 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36930) - you deserved it (15400)

On 04/19/2011 at 2:38am - kids - by randa -

Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML

#15793137
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17517) - you deserved it (27851)

On 04/15/2011 at 7:47am - animals - by spiderwoman (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML

#15773415
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44444) - you deserved it (6715)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -

Today, I found that the love of my life is 3.5 inches, fully erect. My cell phone is bigger than that. FML

#15749213
780 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66724) - you deserved it (14042)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:00am - intimacy - by Artic (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at 21 years old, I am still so flat chested that I can't even fit into training bras meant for 12 year olds. FML

#15679727
588 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49560) - you deserved it (5274)

On 04/07/2011 at 12:55pm - misc - by nerdsgetmehot (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I told my mother I have a girlfriend. Her first answer was "Does she know?" FML

#15655514
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36656) - you deserved it (4805)

On 04/05/2011 at 8:00pm - misc - by notacreeper -

Today, I was walking home through the slush and snow when a car drove by, soaking me with dirty water. Frustrated, I flipped him off. He then turned around and splashed me again. FML

#15637668
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36750) - you deserved it (20415)

On 04/04/2011 at 4:42pm - misc - by lynn777 - Canada (Ontario)



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