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chickenflem
  • Town/Country : hell no, you wish
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 July 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 715
  • Number of comments : 70
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About chickenflem : I love Reading FML before bed, reminds me that I don't own all of the problems in the world haha. Anyways don't take my comments seriously. Chill out. I'm just try a have some fun. Grammar nazis stay away! If u got any questions or just wna chat well sorry. Dont msg me cuz I won't reply, I'm usually on my iPhone so yeah...

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chickenflem's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a mosquito bite on my chest. Due to a severe allergic reaction it has swollen my left breast a cup size. The first thing my boyfriend said was, "Hey look! I can finally see one of them." FML

#20667435
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54074) - you deserved it (5265)

On 05/16/2013 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by Urgghh (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I found a cup full of urine in the bathtub. No one in my family knows where it came from. This is the second time it's happened. FML

#20498051
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24491) - you deserved it (1550)

On 02/08/2013 at 10:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me at my grandma's funeral. FML

#20452848
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41730) - you deserved it (2387)

On 01/10/2013 at 11:06pm - love - by good job bf (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I overheard my mother telling my sister that she expects my marriage to fall apart any day now. Apparently, I have no concept of what "marriage" really means. My husband and I just celebrated our 7th anniversary, while my mother is planning her 5th wedding. FML

#20438192
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39663) - you deserved it (1858)

On 01/02/2013 at 5:31am - love - by alynna007 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at the hospital I work at, I had to deliver my best friend's baby. I later found out that my ex boyfriend was the father. Normally this wouldn't faze me, but it did because we broke up last month. FML

#20429423
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40985) - you deserved it (2601)

On 12/29/2012 at 3:25am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, a guy professed his love for me in front of my friends. The guy is my first cousin. FML

#20414731
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35723) - you deserved it (2932)

On 12/22/2012 at 9:33pm - love - by Brittany (woman) - United States

Today, my friend and I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool, I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out and ran onto the deck, slipping and falling flat on my back. Her dad saw the whole thing. FML

#20407433
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11345) - you deserved it (29742)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my friend was complaining to me about her problems. I tried to be a good, understanding friend, listening and giving advice. When it was my turn to vent, she interrupted me, saying, "Sorry, but I don't really care." FML

#20201674
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26033) - you deserved it (2030)

On 12/12/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by sushichick (woman) - United States

Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML

#20194994
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24933) - you deserved it (15039)

On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I thought I felt something itch my butt as I sat down on the toilet. Sure it was just my imagination, I did my business. When I was done I saw there were 4 cockroaches crawling under the seat. FML

#20194684
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25485) - you deserved it (3981)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:46am - misc - by lingadoo - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)

Today, at a talent show, my band got booed before we even started playing. FML

#20188582
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19110) - you deserved it (2683)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:26pm - misc - by disembob - United Kingdom

Today, while working at my local supermarket, I found a boy lost and wandering about, so I took him to the front desk. My reward from his mother was a slap around the face and harsh words for supposedly having kidnapped him. FML

#20183959
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20810) - you deserved it (1272)

On 11/29/2012 at 1:08pm - work - by bitch i'm a gerontophile (man) - Taiwan

Today, I'm recovering in the emergency room. How did I get here? Intoxicated at a coed party, I saw a hole in the host's shed and thought it funny to christen it a "glory-hole", only to be bitten by what may well have been a black widow spider. FML

#20182587
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5612) - you deserved it (40120)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:09pm - health - by Widowmaker - United States (Nevada)

Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML

#20176033
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24128) - you deserved it (1668)

On 11/24/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Read The Fine Print - United States (California)

Today, I caught my teenage daughter smoking, and tried calmly explaining to her that it's quite bad for her health. She replied with, "It doesn't harm you if you're under 20." FML

#20174862
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26133) - you deserved it (4164)

On 11/23/2012 at 4:07am - kids - by RyanJarmanForPresident (woman) - United States



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