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chefinheels88's favorite FMLs
by tingles / 01/19/2013 at 8:20am / United Kingdom (Solihull) / Intimacy
Today, my teacher's comments on my essay read, "I know it's college, but you use a lot of unnecessary words with a lot of syllables." He basically scolded me for having a complex vocabulary. I go to an accredited state university. Nothing says "America" like under-achieving professors. FML
by Anonymous / 10/03/2012 at 7:00pm / United States (Florida) / Work
by highlandgirl10 / 07/21/2010 at 4:31pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
by blank / 07/21/2010 at 9:52am / United States / Health
Today, I was at work, when a co-worker began to shake a near empty box. Without thinking, I shouted "What if there was a baby in there? You just killed it!" I then remembered she recently suffered a miscarriage. FML
by jjjjjjmmmmm92 / 07/20/2010 at 7:08pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Work
Today, I was helping my friend create an online dating profile. When she got her search results, her #1 match was a blonde guy only 10 miles from her. His description: genuine, laid back, and ready for fun. He left off something kind of important. He's already married. To me. FML
by betrayed / 07/19/2010 at 1:36pm / United States (Missouri) / Love
by knighton16 / 07/17/2010 at 2:23pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
by killer / 07/17/2010 at 10:54am / United States (Florida) / Animals
by Anonymous / 03/06/2010 at 7:32pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, while babysitting a six year old boy, he asked me if I could show him my "boobies." I said no, that wouldn't be very appropriate. Suddenly, he pulled down his pants/undies and pointed to his package while exclaiming, "Look, my penis is on again!" It was pointing RIGHT at me. FML
by Michele / 01/17/2010 at 7:32pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by paidback / 12/24/2009 at 8:10pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I spent hours delicately writing out what seemed to be a beautiful poem to my girlfriend. After I sent it to her, I kept eyeing my phone to see her surprised message. No, my only response was "you may want to use a spellcheck." FML
by Poem / 12/18/2009 at 11:29pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, my boyfriend and I were starting to get in the mood. I get on top of him, lean down to kiss him, and he begins to laugh. Puzzled, I ask him why. He tells me that when I'm naked and on top of him, I remind him of a cow, with 'udders' . Offended, I go to get off. 'No no' he protests, 'a SEXY cow'. FML
by sigh / 08/30/2009 at 7:35pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy
by kat9232000 / 06/19/2009 at 12:04am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…